“10 Surprising Health Benefits of Love”

 

Lower Blood Pressure, Fewer Colds, Better Stress Management Are Just the Beginning

“I need somebody to love,” sang the Beatles, and they got it right. Love and health are intertwined in surprising ways. Humans are wired for connection, and when we cultivate good relationships, the rewards are immense. But we’re not necessarily talking about spine-tingling romance. “There’s no evidence that the intense, passionate stage of a new romance is beneficial to health,” says Harry Reis, PhD, co-editor of the Encyclopedia of Human Relationships. "People who fall in love say it feels wonderful and agonizing at the same time.” All those ups and downs can be a source of stress. It takes a calmer, more stable form of love to yield clear health benefits. “There is very nice evidence that people who participate in satisfying, long-term relationships fare better on a whole variety of health measures,” Reis tells WebMD. Most of the research in this area centers on marriage, but Reis believes many of the perks extend to other close relationships -- for example, with a partner, parent, or friend. The key is to “feel connected to other people, feel respected and valued by other people, and feel a sense of belonging,” he says. Here are 10 research-backed ways that love and health are linked:

1. FEWER DOCTOR’S VISITS: The Health and Human Services Department reviewed a bounty of studies on marriage and health. One of the report’s most striking findings is that married people have fewer doctor’s visits and shorter average hospital stays. “Nobody quite knows why loving relationships are good for health,” Reis says. “The best logic for this is that human beings have been crafted by evolution to live in closely knit social groups. When that is not happening, the biological systems ... get overwhelmed.” Another theory is that people in good relationships take better care of themselves. A spouse may keep you honest in your oral hygiene. A best friend could motivate you to eat more whole grains. Over time, these good habits translate to fewer illnesses.

2. LESS DEPRESSION AND SUBSTANCE ABUSE: According to the Health and Human Services report, getting married and staying married reduces depression in both men and women. This finding is not surprising, Reis says, because social isolation is clearly linked to higher rates of depression. What’s interesting is that marriage also contributes to a decline in heavy drinking and drug abuse, especially among young adults.

3. LOWER BLOOD PRESSURE: A happy marriage is good for your blood pressure. That’s the conclusion of a study in the Annals of Behavioral Medicine. Researchers found happily married people had the best blood pressure, followed by singles. Unhappily married participants fared the worst. Reis says this study illustrates a vital aspect of the way marriage affects health. “It’s marital quality and not the fact of marriage that makes a difference,” he tells WebMD. This supports the idea that other positive relationships can have similar benefits. In fact, singles with a strong social network also did well in the blood pressure study, though not as well as happily married people.

4. LESS ANXIETY: When it comes to anxiety, a loving, stable relationship is superior to new romance. Researchers at the State University of New York at Stony Brook used functional MRI (fMRI) scans to look at the brains of people in love. They compared passionate new couples with strongly connected long-term couples. Both groups showed activation in a part of the brain associated with intense love. “It’s the dopamine-reward area, the same area that responds to cocaine or winning a lot of money,” says Arthur Aron, PhD, one of the study’s authors. But there were striking differences between the two groups in other parts of the brain. In long-term relationships, “you also have activation in the areas associated with bonding ... and less activation in the area that produces anxiety.” The study was presented at the 2008 conference of the Society for Neuroscience.

5. NATURAL PAIN CONTROL: The fMRI study reveals another big perk for long-term couples -- more activation in the part of the brain that keeps pain under control. A CDC report complements this finding. In a study of more than 127,000 adults, married people were less likely to complain of headaches and back pain. A small study published in Psychological Science adds to the intrigue. Researchers subjected 16 married women to the threat of an electric shock. When the women were holding their husband’s hand, they showed less response in the brain areas associated with stress. The happier the marriage, the greater the effect.

6. BETTER STRESS MANAGEMENT: If love helps people cope with pain, what about other types of stress? Aron says there is evidence of a link between social support and stress management. “If you’re facing a stressor and you’ve got the support of someone who loves you, you can cope better,” he tells WebMD. If you lose your job, for example, it helps emotionally and financially if a partner is there to support you.

7. FEWER COLDS: We’ve seen that loving relationships can reduce stress, anxiety, and depression -- a fact that may give the immune system a boost. Researchers at Carnegie Mellon University found that people who exhibit positive emotions are less likely to get sick after exposure to cold or flu viruses. The study, published in Psychosomatic Medicine, compared people who were happy and calm with those who appeared anxious, hostile, or depressed.

8. FASTER HEALING: The power of a positive relationship may make flesh wounds heal faster. Researchers at Ohio State University Medical Center gave married couples blister wounds. The wounds healed nearly twice as fast in spouses who interacted warmly compared with those who demonstrated a lot of hostility toward each other. The study was published in the Archives of General Psychiatry.

9. LONGER LIFE: A growing body of research indicates that married people live longer. One of the largest studies examines the effect of marriage on mortality during an eight-year period in the 1990s. Using data from the National Health Interview Survey, researchers found that people who had never been married were 58% more likely to die than married people. Aron tells WebMD marriage contributes to longer life mostly through “mutual practical support, financial benefits, and children who provide support.” But Reis sees an emotional explanation. Marriage protects against death by warding off feelings of isolation. “Loneliness is associated with all-cause mortality -- dying for any reason,” he says. In other words, married people live longer because they feel loved and connected.

10. HAPPIER LIFE: It may seem obvious that one of love’s greatest benefits is joy. But research is just beginning to reveal how strong this link can be. A study in the Journal of Family Psychology shows happiness depends more on the quality of family relationships than on the level of income. And so, we have scientific evidence that, at least in some ways, the power of love trumps the power of money.

NURTURE YOUR RELATIONSHIPS:

To foster a loving relationship that yields concrete benefits, Aron offers four tips:

• If you are depressed or anxious, get treatment.
• Brush up on communication skills and learn to handle conflict.
• Do things that are challenging and exciting with your loved one on a regular basis.
• Celebrate each other's successes.

This last point is crucial, Aron tells WebMD. Although partners often provide support during a crisis, this support is even more beneficial during good times. As the proverb goes, Shared sorrow is half sorrow; shared joy is double joy.

By Sherry Rauh, Reviewed by Louise Change, MD, WebMD on January 30, 2009

SOURCES:

Harry Reis, PhD, professor of psychology, University of Rochester; co-editor, Encyclopedia of Human Relationships.

Department of Health and Human Services: “The Effects of Marriage on Health: A Synthesis of Recent Research Evidence."

WebMD Health News: "Happy Marriage, Better Blood Pressure."

Arthur Aron, PhD, professor of psychology, State University of New York at Stony Brook.

Annual meeting of the Society for Neuroscience, Washington, D.C., Nov. 15-19 2008.

WebMD Health News: "The Health Perks of Marriage."

Psychological Science, December 2006.

Psychosomatic Medicine, November 2006.

Archives of General Psychiatry, December 2005.

WebMD Health News: "For Happiness, Seek Family, Not Fortune."

Much Love, Dr.Shermaine, #InformativeRead #PleaseShare #HealthyBodySoulAndSpirit #IWantYou2LiveWell #FeelFree2SignUpAndFollow

The Goal is to Always Make You Aware of What Concerns Your Body, Soul and Spirit, So You Can Have Open, Honest and Frequent Discussions With Your Physicians and Counselors. You Can’t Treat or Cure What You Don’t Know is Sick.
 
"It's Not Selfish to Love Yourself, Take Care of Yourself and to Make Your Happiness a Priority. It's a Necessity." (Mandy Hale)

"Self-Care is Not Selfish. You Cannot Serve From an Empty Vessel." (Eleanor Brown)

The contents of the WebMD and Self-Care With Dr. Shermaine Sites, such as text, graphics, images, and other material contained on the WebMD and Self-Care With Dr. Shermaine Sites ("Content") are for informational purposes only. The Content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on the WebMD and Self-Care With Dr. Shermaine Sites!

If you think you may have a medical emergency, call your doctor or 911 immediately. WebMD and Self-Care With Dr. Shermaine does not recommend or endorse any specific tests, physicians, products, procedures, opinions, or other information that may be mentioned on the Sites. Reliance on any information provided by WebMD, WebMD employees, others appearing on the Site at the invitation of WebMD, and Self-Care With Dr. Shermaine or other visitors to the Sites is solely at your own risk.  

“18 Habits of the Happiest – Healthiest Families”

 

 

GET HAPPY! Sometimes it may seem like every member of your family is heading in a different direction: kids have school, sports, and extracurricular's, not to mention it's increasingly tough to tear them away from their smartphones. And if you're like 59% of two-parent American families, then both you and your partner have jobs outside the home. But even if you often find yourselves embarking on separate paths, the most important relationships you can foster are those right at home—they make us who we are, after all. We asked top experts what the happiest families do to successfully come together and grow as a unit. Try bringing these 18 easy-to-adopt habits into your own home.

THEY CREATE A FAMILY MISSION STATEMENT: Organizations and companies create mission statements as a way to articulate goals. Families can do it for the same reasons: to teach kids values and bring the family unit closer. Kids can even contribute to the process, although "the level of involvement would need to be adjusted based on the age," says Simon Rego, PsyD, director of psychology training at Montefiore Medical Center in New York City. "Younger children would likely benefit from being informed about the family's mission statement then held to it, while older children may be invited to shape it." In any case, you're all partners.

THEY TAKE FAMILY HISTORY TRIPS: If you can afford to visit the haunts of your forefathers and mothers in Italy or Ireland, then great—but it doesn't have to be that complicated or expensive. You could even take your kids to the spot where you and your partner met, or the town where you or another relative grew up. "Making that family history come alive builds relationships," says AARP family expert Amy Goyer. Even better, invite grandma and grandpa along on the trip. They are, after all, the ultimate family historians.

THEY TELL STORIES: Take a trip without ever leaving the house by sharing stories with your kids from your past, and by inviting your parents and grandparents to join in. "Sharing family stories with grandchildren passes on the family's culture and traditions and provides a sense of connection across the generations," says Carroll Tingle, chair of human development and family studies at the University of Alabama. One way to do this is to let the children interview their grandparents. "They might ask what the grandparent remembers about the day the grandchild was born," Tingle says. "Truth is, most children love best those stories where they are the main character."

THE KIDS ARE CLOSE WITH THEIR GRANDPARENTS: Be sure the two generations have plenty of time to visit or at least talk. Grandparents can be a stabilizing influence: a study in the Journal of Family Psychology found that adolescents who had more grandparent involvement in their lives had fewer emotional problems and were more social than those who had less grandparent involvement. This was especially true in single-parent households and step-families. “Connections between the generations have long-term benefits for grandparents, parents and children," confirms Tingle.

THEY HAVE FAMILY MEETINGS: If you're old enough to remember The Brady Bunch, you'll also remember the official family meeting. It's an idea worth borrowing, says Marcia Slattery, MD, professor of psychiatry at the University of Wisconsin School of Medicine and Public Health. "It's designated time. Everybody has input and looks forward to it. It's sacred time you keep together." You can incorporate the family meeting into regularly scheduled programming such as Sunday dinner or make it a separate piece of the weekly schedule. "Agenda" items could include reviewing the past week, the upcoming week's schedule, new activities or problems at school.

THEY HAVE FAMILY RITUALS: Establish a routine where all members of the family know that you're doing something together on certain days of the week—think watching movies together on Friday evenings, going to the farmers market with grandma on Saturday mornings, or making a new type of pizza every Tuesday. Or you could be more creative together, making old-fashioned photo books and adding captions to the pictures. "It's like an investment," says Rego. "You create structured time as a family and treat it as a commodity."

THEY THANK EACH OTHER OFTEN: Encourage your kids and spouse to keep secret journals where they record all the times they find family members doing something good like when a child clears the dinner table without being asked, goes to bed without an argument, or when Dad picks up the dry cleaning for Mom. At the weekly family meeting, everyone can take turns acknowledging someone else. "They consciously and deliberately thank each other for the good things they've noticed them doing," says Rego. It doesn't have to end here: One study found that kids who wrote gratitude letters were happier. Other studies have shown that being grateful in general can make us not only happier, but healthier too.

THEY VOLUNTEER TOGETHER: Volunteering is gratitude-in-action, a time to express thanks by doing something positive for the community. Time spent in service teaches kids values and empathy and gives them new places to learn. It could be as simple as donating to a food bank, picking up garbage, or helping out at a homeless shelter. It could even be a way to exercise together: you could train for a Bike MS ride (a nationwide series of bicycle rides that benefits the National Multiple Sclerosis Society), or create a Relay for Life team (overnight walk-runs benefiting the American Cancer Society, and also held nationwide). "There are an infinite number of ways we can engage in volunteerism or charity and any one of them help enhance the overall climate of the family," says Rego.

EACH CHILD GETS ONE-ON-ONE TIME: Time spent together as a group is important, but so is spending time with each of your kids individually. "Every child will be unique and needs to feel that parents are interested in them as much as any sibling," says Slattery. You can pick specific days of the week to spend dedicated time with each of your children, either at home or away from home. Or you can make sure you spend a portion of each evening (maybe before bed) with each child separately.

THEY HAVE ESTABLISHED SLEEP ROUTINES: Let's face it: well-rested family members are easier to be around. But science points to other benefits as well. One study found that infants and toddlers who kept to a consistent bedtime routine including a bath, applying lotion, and quiet activities, slept better and woke less often than those who had no routine. And children who go to bed at the same time every night had fewer behavioral problems than those who didn't have a regular bedtime, research shows. Children and adults who get enough sleep are also less likely to be obese.

THEY KEEP AN ACTIVITY CALENDAR: Keep track of gymnastics practice, soccer games, music lessons, and whatever other activities your family is juggling on a whiteboard, wall calendar, or by using an app like Cozi (which is owned by Health's parent company). This facilitates communication and keeps everyone organized, says Slattery. This is useful even when your lives are less hectic, like when the kids are out of school and too much unstructured time creates anxiety. When that's the case, Slattery suggests creating slots for physical exercise, brain exercise (such as reading), social interaction, and playtime each week. "The big areas I emphasize are consistency and routines," she says. "The predictability and stability of what we do and when goes a long way."

THEY WRITE OUT CHORES AND EXPECTATIONS: Along with a mission statement, everyone should know what chores they're expected to do. Involve the kids in making the house rules (at least up to a point) by giving them options for their weekly responsibilities: Would they rather feed the dog, clear the table after dinner, or take out the garbage? "Make it specific and concrete and tangible," says Slattery. Tape the list to the inside of a cupboard door. "That takes away the 'I didn't say that' and 'What are you talking about?'" she adds.

THEY LAUGH TOGETHER: Tell jokes, watch funny movies, and above all else, learn how to laugh at yourselves. "It's very important to integrate humor into the home on a regular basis," says Slattery. Research has shown that laughter can improve mood, boost our immune systems, and improve heart health. Private jokes (as long as they're not cruel or demeaning) can be another way of fostering connections within the family, adds Rego. Nicknames—maybe a teen child is still "Pooh Bear" because that was their favorite stuffed teddy as a child—can also foster connections.

THEY EAT DINNER TOGETHER: Families that eat dinner together are healthier and happier, and family mealtime teaches kids to love good-for-you foods and to control their portions. "Taking the time to sit down and talk and share food is just one of many ways to catch up with each other," says Lynn Barendsen, executive director of the Family Dinner Project, an organization that encourages family meals and family time. Take it to another level by wearing your PJs at the dinner table. The wardrobe change helps set mealtime apart from other sitting times that may seem boring to kids, like school, say the Family Dinner Project experts.

THEY HELP THE KIDS OPEN UP: If your kids tend to clam up during family meals—especially if they're teetering on the teen years—try "table topics." These are slips of paper in a bowl at the center of the table that have conversation starters and questions written on them. Fun, even nonsensical topics can be mixed in with nutrition questions so kids learn tips for a lifetime, says Wesley Delbridge, RD, a spokesperson with the Academy of Nutrition and Dietetics. Some suggestions: "If you could be any superhero, which would you be?" and "What is your favorite fruit and vegetable?" Topics can be tailored for any and all age groups.

THEY COMMUNICATE CONSISTENTLY: Consistency is a good general rule for any household. This holds especially true for communication. "Open communication clearly has been shown to be helpful for kids to learn self-expression and problem solving," says Slattery. Make an effort to communicate at consistent times such as during family meals and at bedtime. And make sure all family members have an opportunity to speak and also practice active listening. "That means respectfully paying attention to what another family member is talking about and asking appropriate follow-up questions or comments to convey you've heard what they've said and are interested," says Slattery. "Don't interrupt and don't just talk about yourself."

THEY UNPLUG ONCE IN AWHILE: You don't want your kids' (or your) main relationship to be with an iPhone. Turn all screens off when it's designated time to talk to each other, like the family meeting or dinnertime, suggests Slattery. "This goes for parents too," says Slattery. "When kids approach parents, they should move away from their computer or phone and be there to respectfully listen." Among other things, this teaches active listening.

THEY USE TECHNOLOGY TO THEIR ADVANTAGE: While you don't want to be immersed in a screen 24/7, there are times when it can be helpful—for keeping in touch with grandparents, for example. Tingle's grandchildren live five hours away but she reads to them "virtually" on a regular basis. "While I narrate, they sit looking at the illustrations (from my computer screen to theirs) just as mesmerized as if they were sitting in my lap," she says. She also sets her laptop on the kitchen counter so they can cook together. "Emails, text messages, and tweets are great ways to share laughs, encouragement, learning experiences and just to let them know you care," she adds. "I've sung lullabies via speaker phone to infant grandchildren who are resisting sleep."

By: Amanda Gardner, Health

 

 The contents of the Health Magazine and Self-Care With Dr. Shermaine Sites, such as text, graphics, images, and other material contained on the Health Magazine and Self-Care With Dr. Shermaine Sites ("Content") are for informational purposes only. The Content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on the Health Magazine and Self-Care With Dr. Shermaine Sites!

If you think you may have a medical emergency, call your doctor or 911 immediately. Health Magazine and Self-Care With Dr. Shermaine does not recommend or endorse any specific tests, physicians, products, procedures, opinions, or other information that may be mentioned on the Sites. Reliance on any information provided by Health Magazine, Health Magazine employees, others appearing on the Site at the invitation of Health Magazine, and Self-Care With Dr. Shermaine or other visitors to the Sites is solely at your own risk. 

Much Love, Dr.Shermaine #InformativeRead #PleaseShare #HealthyBodySoulAndSpirit #IWantYou2LiveWell #FeelFree2SignUpAndFollow

The Goal is to Always Make You Aware of What Concerns Your Body, Soul and Spirit, So You Can Have Open, Honest and Frequent Discussions With Your Physicians and Counselors. You Can’t Treat or Cure What You Don’t Know is Sick.

 
"It's Not Selfish to Love Yourself, Take Care of Yourself and to Make Your Happiness a Priority. It's a Necessity." (Mandy Hale)

"Self-Care is Not Selfish. You Cannot Serve From an Empty Vessel." (Eleanor Brown)