Our Own Worst Enemy:
Our mind and mood are keenly
sensitive to the world around us. Distressing
life events—a bad breakup, unemployment, the death of a loved one—often
leave us rattled or sad, of course, but our daily routine and patterns of
thinking also have a big impact on our mood. Bad habits like skimping on
sleep, drinking too much, or nursing grudges
can undermine our mental health, whether that means a brief episode of
the blues or full-blown depression and anxiety. Happily, many of these
mental pitfalls can be avoided. We break down 12 of the most common and provide
tips for how to steer clear.
Avoiding Exercise: Why It's Harmful: In addition to keeping your body in shape, physical
activity plays a key role in propping up mood; it can even help ease the symptoms of depression and
anxiety, research suggests. Regular exercise appears to have a
positive effect on brain chemicals and mood-related hormones, and
it may confer psychological benefits
(such as increased confidence) that
foster better mental health. What You Can Do: If you struggle to stick to a workout schedule, it
might be too ambitious. To start, try setting aside 15 to 20 minutes per day
for a brisk walk. Studies have shown that even modest exercise routines are
associated with improved mood.
Ignoring Clutter: Why It's Harmful: Even if your pack-rat tendencies don't rise to the
level of hoarding, unchecked clutter in your home can be a
subtle source of psychological distress.
"Clutter
makes us feel weighed down, both literally and figuratively,"
says Dawn
Buse, PhD, a health psychologist at Montefiore Medical Center, in New York
City. "It has been shown to be related to
depression, anxiety, and even weight gain." What You Can Do: If you haven't
used something in 12 months, give it away, Buse suggests.
And instead of spending your money on more stuff, consider saving up for a
special dinner or vacation. Research shows that these so-called experiential
purchases actually buy us more happiness than material goods do.
Not Sleeping Enough: Why It's Harmful: Anyone who's missed out on sleep thanks to a deadline
or bawling infant is familiar with the irritability, stress, and gloom that can set in the next day. If sleep deprivation and disturbances
become chronic,
they increase a person’s risk of developing depression or anxiety disorders. What You Can Do: Prioritize
sleep and practice healthy bedtime behaviors, such as limiting caffeine and
alcohol in the hours before bed. It's
also important to curb your computer, tablet, and smartphone use late at night,
Buse says; the blue light emitted by these devices
suppresses the sleep hormone melatonin and
can disrupt your circadian
rhythm.
Drinking Too Much: Why It's Harmful: Alcohol depresses
the nervous
system, slowing you down and potentially dragging your mood down as
well. What's more, drinking too much alcohol in the evening—though it may
initially make you sleepy—tends to cause nighttime waking and less refreshing
sleep, Buse says. What You Can Do: Limit your intake to "moderate" levels, which doctors define as one drink per day
for women and two drinks per day for men. If it's a special occasion and you do
choose to exceed those limits, be sure to pace yourself, count your drinks, and
alternate alcoholic beverages with water. (Or as my usual disclaimer, avoid alcohol altogether!)
Keeping Up With the
Joneses: Why It's Harmful: Constantly comparing our income or possessions to
those of others is "one of the reasons Americans are not as happy as people
in other countries," Buse says.
Coveting your neighbor's riches tends to breed dissatisfaction, and it's also a
bit irrational,
since the relationship between income and happiness
is actually much weaker than we think. What You Can Do:
Focus instead on being grateful for what you do have. Studies have shown that simple
exercises—such as keeping a "gratitude journal," or writing a letter
to a loved one—are associated with greater satisfaction, optimism, and happiness.
Obsessive Thinking: Why It's Harmful: Turning the same thoughts over and over again in your
mind sends your body
and brain into the stressed-out
state known as fight
or flight, Buse says.
Your breathing and heart rate
quicken, and your body releases the stress hormones adrenaline and cortisol,
all of which takes a toll on both your physical and emotional health. What You Can Do: Learn to
recognize the thoughts you dwell on most, and train yourself to avoid those
obsessive pathways. Deep breathing helps,
as does snapping yourself out of it—literally. "Put a rubber band on your wrist as a
reminder and every time you're ruminating, pull it back a little,"
Buse advises. "It's a reminder to stop ruminating and
change your train of thought."
Bottling Up Anger: Why It's Harmful: Anger and frustration
are completely normal reactions to life's inevitable challenges. But
when you suppress those feelings and let your grudges and grievances fester, it can backfire. Several studies, in
fact, have found that suppressed anger and angry brooding—a type of obsessive
thinking—are associated with depression symptoms. What You Can Do:
It's important to express negative emotions, but only in appropriate ways. If
you can communicate your anger in an assertive but calm manner, you're likely
to feel better afterward. If that's not an option, your best bet might be to
just let it go: Research suggests the act of forgiving confers mental health benefits.
Working Too Much: Why It's Harmful: When our
work-life balance is out of whack, we tend to get stressed-out and we increase our risk of more serious mental
health problems. A 2011 study of British civil servants found that working
11-plus hours a day (versus a more
reasonable 7 or 8) more than doubled a person's odds of sliding into depression.
What You Can Do: Think carefully
about your values
and priorities and make sure your
schedule reflects them, Buse advises.
And set aside time for family, friends, and hobbies the same way you'd commit to a meeting at work.
"It
sounds kind of funny to plan for fun or relaxation, but making it protected
time is really important," Buse says.
Staying Inside: Why It's Harmful: Holing up
inside deprives us of two mental-health essentials: vitamin D, which is produced by
the body in response to sunlight and
has been shown to protect against depression, and nature itself, which appears to
soothe us on a subconscious level. In a recent study, brain scans showed that
people who walked through parks were calmer and less frustrated than when they
walked on busy city streets. What You Can Do: Get outside! If
you work in an office, take a walk—in a green space, if possible—or sit outside
during your lunch break. "Even a pretty small amount of sunlight—15 minutes—can
really, really help," Buse says.
Social Isolation: Why It's Harmful: Although
withdrawing from friends and family is a common symptom of depression and anxiety, social isolation—and especially
accompanying feelings of loneliness—also increases the likelihood of
experiencing those mental health problems. By the same token, strong
relationships tend to protect against depression and
promote happiness.
What You Can Do: Even if you're preoccupied or not in the
mood, make an effort to connect (or
reconnect) with friends and loved ones, even for just a few minutes over
coffee. Social interactions like this are uplifting—and they often end up being
more fun than we expect, experts say.
Perfectionism: Why It's Harmful: Trying to meet an unattainably high standard of perfection in everything you do, be it
tonight's dinner or tomorrow's work presentation, is a recipe for disappointment and low self-esteem. So it's not surprising that
perfectionism has been linked to a suite of mental health problems including depression,
anxiety, and eating disorders. What You Can Do: Instead
of perfectionism, aim for what mental health experts call healthy striving. That means
setting more attainable
goals, welcoming mistakes as avenues for learning, and, most of
all, enjoying
the journey, not just the destination.
Pessimism: Why It's Harmful: How
hopeful and upbeat you are about the world is something of a self-fulfilling
prophecy. Pessimists who consistently view the glass as half
empty
appear to be more vulnerable
to depression, anxiety, sleep disorders, and other health problems. Optimism, on the other hand, seem to
help with coping and protect against those same conditions. What You Can Do: Practice
focusing your thoughts on positive things. (A gratitude list can be a
powerful tool here.)
And if you're not feeling happier, fake it till you make it. "Studies
have shown that smiling can actually make you feel happier and more optimistic
about the present and future,"
Buse says.
Depression-Fighting
Tips:
Medication Can Help Depression. But a type of therapy called cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT)—which
focuses on changing
behavior, rather than talking about your childhood, for instance—can
be an effective adjuvant to or even substitute for drugs. “It’s much more focused on what you seem to
be doing and thinking that is keeping you depressed,” Simon Rego, PsyD,
director of psychology training at Montefiore Medical Center in New York City.
Some of its methods can be practiced at home, on yourself, with no special
training. So here are some tips for breaking the cycle of negativity.
Don't Catastrophize: One way to sabotage yourself is to take a single event and treat it as an ongoing source of negativity.
"People
who are unemployed do this a lot," says Rego. "They've lost their job because of the
economy and they personalize it." It's also unhealthy to
catastrophize—focus
on the worst imagined outcome,
even if it's irrational. For example, don't let concerns about money escalate
into the conviction you'll soon be homeless. Instead of thinking, "I'll never get
another job," try to say to yourself: "I will get
another job. It just may take some time."
Stop Ruminating:
Ever clash with a colleague or fight with a friend and then keep obsessively
thinking about it, amplifying the
anger,
stress, and anxiety associated
with the memory? Known as rumination, this type of thinking is linked to
a greater risk of becoming or staying depressed. While reflection is a good thing, and may help you solve problems,
rumination
does the opposite. If you catch yourself ruminating, studies suggest
it may help if you try to distract yourself, meditate, or redirect your thoughts.
Cognitive
behavioral therapy often targets
rumination because it can be so damaging to mental health.
Retire Your Crystal Ball: Very few (if
any) of us are blessed with the ability to predict the future. But
depressed people will often convince themselves they know what will happen a
day, a month, or a year down the line. And it's usually bad, if not downright
catastrophic. Fortunately,
our dire predictions rarely come true. Try to stay in the present. It's much more manageable and you're less
likely to blow things out of proportion.
Don't Dwell on the Past: It's pretty pointless to tell yourself you should have
done this or shouldn't have done that. You can't change the past, but you can live
in the present. Just accept that you made the best decisions you
could have made with the information or resources you had at the time. Hindsight is
always 20/20, so best to try to just let it go and don't beat yourself up for
perceived missteps. And do a rumination check; ruminating about the
past can generate anxiety, just as worry about
the future.
Reach Out to Others: A hallmark of depression is
isolation.
It can happen easily if you're not working, or you're avoiding people because
you're depressed.
But reinvigorating or expanding a social network provides
an opportunity to get support, perhaps even from people in the same
or a similar situation, says Rego. "Once you start reconnecting with people,
you get a sense they understand," he says. "You get positive
advice and encouragement and it's often done in activities that end up being
fun." Staying home alone will perpetuate the depression.
Getting out with other people—even a little bit—will lift your spirits.
Stick to a Structured Routine: Even if you don't feel like it, make sure you get up
at a set time, eat meals at the same hour every day (even if you're not hungry), and
avoid lounging on the couch during the day lest it prevent you from sleeping
well at night. "People who are depressed tend to eat or sleep
inconsistently," says Rego. "Even if you're unemployed or feeling down,
it's really important to set and establish a daily routine as best you can.
This gives you a sense of regularity that can help with a depressed mood."
If you can incorporate socializing into
your routine, all the better.
Avoid Black and White Thinking: Black and white is great for zebras, but not thoughts.
Depressed people tend to think in extremes: I'm a loser. No one loves me. I'll never get a job. But
your thought patterns could put you in a rut or keep you there. "Being depressed
or sad is going to color the way you think about yourself in a negative
direction," says Rego. These thoughts can paralyze you and stop
you from doing the very things that will get you out of a lousy situation. Try
to think in shades of gray, says David R. Blackburn, PhD, a psychologist with Scott &
White Hospital in Temple, Texas. Instead of "no one loves me,"
try "lots
of people (if not everybody) loves me."
Reality Check Your Thoughts:
If you're
depressed, negative thoughts go with the territory. However, they are
rarely grounded in reality. Once
you've identified a negative thought, ask yourself, "Where is the evidence that I'm the most
despicable human being on the entire earth?" There probably
isn't any. "You
can't just be rattling these thoughts back and forth and saying they're true,"
says Blackburn.
"You
have to come up with some solid evidence." And if you're
worried about what people are thinking about you, go ahead and ask them.
Choose Smart Goals:
Select a few simple,
straightforward goals you can
easily set and follow, suggests Rego. Those goals should be SMART, which stands for "specific,
measurable, attainable, rewarding, and time-limited." So for
example, deciding you will have a job by the end of the week is unrealistic.
But deciding to post two resumes online by the end of the week, on the other
hand, is SMART. "It's specific.
It's attainable. It's not that much effort to do and it could be rewarding,"
says Rego.
Fake it a Bit: Write down all the things you used to like doing that
you've stopped doing because you're sad and depressed, suggests Rego,
who is also assistant professor of psychiatry and behavioral sciences at Albert Einstein
College of Medicine. That could be going to the movies, socializing
with friends, or simply going to the corner coffee shop with a newspaper. Then,
one by one, start reincorporating these activities into your life even if
you're feeling unenthusiastic about it. Also, focus on tasks that can give you
a sense of mastery
or accomplishment, whether it's tidying up the apartment or paying
the bills. That can help ease the depression as
well.
Don't Deny Depression: If your present situation,
well, sucks, denying it will only make things worse. "Some
people don't accept they're depressed and instead beat themselves up or think
they're crazy or weak,"
says Rego. This may only drive you
deeper down, while acceptance can relieve the suffering, he says. In
general, knowing and accepting that you're depressed can allow you to take
steps to make it better or get treatment, rather than pretend that everything's
just fine.
Treat Yourself Well:
Take a look at the language you use when you think about or talk to yourself
and compare it to the way you talk to everyone else. If there's a disconnect,
try to treat yourself in a kinder, gentler way. "We're
often kind to everybody else but we beat ourselves up. That's a double
standard,"
says Blackburn. "It
would be preferable to use a single standard: Don't beat everyone else up, but
get off your own back, too."
By: Amanda Gardner, Health Magazine
"Your Mental Health is More Important Than the Test, the Interview, the Lunch Date, the Meeting, the Family Dinner, the Soccer Game, the Recital, and the Grocery Run! Take Care of Yourself" (Naked With Anxiety)
THIS TOOL DOES NOT PROVIDE MEDICAL ADVICE. It is intended for
general informational purposes only and does not address individual
circumstances. It is not a substitute for professional medical advice,
diagnosis or treatment and should not be relied on to make decisions about your
health. Never ignore professional medical advice in seeking treatment because
of something you have read on this Site. If you think you may have a medical
emergency, immediately call your doctor or dial 911.
Much Love, Dr.Shermaine #InformativeRead #PleaseShare #HealthyBodySoulAndSpirit
"It's Not Selfish to Love Yourself, Take Care of Yourself and to Make Your Happiness a Priority. It's a Necessity." (Mandy Hale)
"Self-Care is Not Selfish. You Cannot Serve From an Empty Vessel." (Eleanor Brown)
