"The Men Have Spoken: 9 Things Men Love To Hear"

 

Society would have you believe that men don’t have any feelings or show emotions, but in fact, men are as much emotional beings as women are.  Yes, even so-called “real” men, too. The power of the spoken word is healing or detrimental – depending on how you use it. So, let’s lift up the men we love with our words. Here’s nine phrases that the 100 men we surveyed wanted to hear:

9. “I’M PROUD OF YOU”

Men see their self-worth differently than women do. I remember being asked why I am so driven to succeed professionally. “Isn’t being a good man enough?” We strive towards goals and accomplishments whether it be at our job or a business we have chosen to start. Much of our confidence is dependent on how well we do in accomplishing these goals. Having the support of the woman in our life and know that you think we are doing a good job (professionally or personally) is reassuring in ways that many other statements can never be.

8. “THANK YOU”

Whether it is something small like picking up your prescription down the street, taking you to dinner, or getting that coffee in the morning — these two small words go a long way. Kindness should never be given to someone for the sake of a return, but appreciation should always be expressed when someone puts in effort.

7. “I SEE YOU”

Men get down on themselves about their bodies, too. We all want to have better abs or a more defined chest. We want to feel like we can protect you and ourselves. We want to feel strong. We want to feel like men. When we do put in the effort to start eating better and working out, we are hoping it gets noticed. But, not just by anyone — BY YOU. Telling us that you can see an improvement (no matter how small) from our efforts will reinforce us and encourage us to continue along our path. Staying motivated is not easy.

6. “I TRUST YOU”

With all of the negativity floating around in the world today, it is much easier to keep ourselves guarded and not fully trust somebody. The truth is, though, that if a man does not feel trusted, he will constantly feel insecure in the relationship. He will feel that you will be suspicious of everything he does or says and that you will not fully open up to him about how you feel. If a man knows that you trust him, it will bring a new level of security to the relationship.

5. “YOU LOOK HANDSOME”

It is said a good man should always remind his woman how beautiful he thinks she is–in part because he doesn’t want another man to do it more than him. Yet, it's also a great feeling for a man to be told he is handsome by someone he cares about. Just the word ‘handsome’ holds a different meaning than other compliments and seems to hit us a little differently. For those of us who do put effort into our appearance and don’t just toss on a t-shirt and jeans to go out to dinner, it is appreciated when our efforts are noticed. And even if we are known just to put on a t-shirt and jeans, when we do something different, it should be noticed as well.

4. “I DON'T CARE ABOUT YOUR PAST”

Putting it out there plain and simple for any man to know and believe is a great way to let him know that no matter what happened in the past, his past hurts, his past transgressions, that you’re still there and want only him. Even the so-called “players” have their time that they want to settle down. If you put it all out on the table, that man can never say he did not know.

3. “I SUPPORT YOU”

Whether we are working on a new business, starting a new gym routine, taking a new class, or undertaking any other venture in life — knowing that we have the undying support of the woman we love will make us feel like we always have a safety net for when things get rough.

2. “I APPRECIATE YOU”

This goes beyond the ‘thank you’ point, because appreciating someone for the person that they are is on a different level than appreciating things that they do for you. As men who work to keep you happy, become the best versions of ourselves, be good to others and to our family — it is very important to us to know that our efforts are truly appreciated.

1. “YOU MAKE ME HAPPY”

Wow! This statement right here is amazing. It encompasses the support, appreciation and trust. Any gentleman who is in a relationship will be striving to be a source of happiness in his woman’s life. Make sure he realizes that he is.

SOURCE: November 14, 2021 by Carter Higgins, BDO (BlackDoctor.Org, Special Contributor

Much Love, Dr.Shermaine, #InformativeRead #PleaseShare #HealthyBodySoulAndSpirit #IWantYou2LiveWell #FeelFree2SignUpAndFollow

The Goal is to Always Make You Aware of What Concerns Your Body, Soul and Spirit, So You Can Have Open, Honest and Frequent Discussions With Your Physicians and Counselors. You Can’t Treat or Cure What You Don’t Know is Sick.
 
"It's Not Selfish to Love Yourself, Take Care of Yourself and to Make Your Happiness a Priority. It's a Necessity." (Mandy Hale)

"Self-Care is Not Selfish. You Cannot Serve From an Empty Vessel." (Eleanor Brown)

The contents of the Black Doctor and Self-Care With Dr. Shermaine Sites, such as text, graphics, images, and other material contained on the Black Doctor and Self-Care With Dr. Shermaine Sites ("Content") are for informational purposes only. The Content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on the Black Doctor and Self-Care With Dr. Shermaine Sites!

If you think you may have a medical emergency, call your doctor or 911 immediately. Black Doctor and Self-Care With Dr. Shermaine does not recommend or endorse any specific tests, physicians, products, procedures, opinions, or other information that may be mentioned on the Sites. Reliance on any information provided by Black Doctor, Black Doctor employees, others appearing on the Site at the invitation of Black Doctor, and Self-Care With Dr. Shermaine or other visitors to the Sites is solely at your own risk.  

“How to Stop Emotional Eating From Stress”

 

OUR TIES TO FOOD ARE STRONG: We must eat to survive. But over time, we’ve found pleasure in our food choices. Eating during times of stress can help ease emotions. But the binge-guilt-binge cycle that can follow gets in the way of our efforts to eat healthy. Here are some tips and tricks to help you stop "eating your feelings."

KNOW WHAT’S HAPPENING: Some people eat less when they're under stress. Others need the distraction of comfort food or fattening snacks when things aren't going right. Because the effect is temporary, you may find yourself eating when you’re not hungry, or without thinking about it. That can lead to unhealthy decisions. So always be aware of what you're eating and why you're eating it.

KEEP A FOOD DIARY: Write down everything you eat during the day. Also note what time you ate it and where you were when you did. A food diary is a great tool to help you track your habits and patterns. Are you snacking between meals? Is food a constant companion? You’ll start to see how healthy -- or unhealthy -- your food choices are. Better yet, it will help you set goals that can really help.

CHECK IF YOU’RE REALLY HUNGRY: If you just ate a big meal and are still reaching for snacks, ask yourself: Are you hungry, or are your emotions causing the cravings? You may want to do something different until the urge passes, like take a walk or call a friend. Or you could try to drink some water. Your body may be trying to tell you it’s dehydrated.

GET SUPPORT: Make sure you have family and friends who can keep you positive and focused in times of stress. It can really help you stick to a healthy lifestyle. Research shows that people with high-stress jobs have better mental health when they have strong support networks.

FOCUS ON YOUR GOALS: Don’t get too hung up on things like calorie counts, menu planning, and watching the scale. It might make you lose track of the lifestyle changes you're after. In fact, being stuck in a food rut can lead to more cravings. Don’t be afraid to try new foods, or different ways of preparing old favorites. Make sure to reward yourself with a healthy treat if you reach a key goal.   

DON’T TEMPT YOURSELF: Remove the urge to snack on unhealthy foods by keeping them out of your home. Worried about making bad choices when you shop? Stick to a strict grocery list of healthy foods, and never visit the grocery store when you’re hungry or in a bad mood.

MAKE HEALTHY CHOICES: Have an abundant supply of good-for-you nibblers at the ready if you get hungry between meals. Things like fruit, vegetables with a low-fat dip, nuts, or even unbuttered popcorn are perfect. Or try low-fat versions of the foods you already enjoy.

DON’T BE SO HARD ON YOURSELF: Don’t obsess over your failures. Instead, learn from your mistakes. Don’t let one or two missteps create more stress. Instead, focus on the big picture and recognize how you can break your stress-eating cycle.

MAKE SUBSTITUTES: If you’re craving pizza, try putting tomato sauce, veggies, and part-skim mozzarella on pita bread. Really want tacos? Make a taco salad instead, using beans, tomatoes, cheese, and hot sauce. If you have a sweet tooth, try “fun size” versions of the real thing or mini ice cream bars as a substitute. You’ll still get the pleasure of your favorite foods without wrecking your diet.

MEDITATE: When the urge to eat hits you, try some relaxation techniques. Mindful meditation can ease stress and help fight the impulse that triggers stress eating. Choose a quiet place to sit and observe your thoughts and your breathing. Don't judge how you feel. Just notice what you're thinking and ease your focus back to your breathing.

WORK UP A SWEAT: A good workout triggers your body to make chemicals called endorphins that interact with your brain to calm and relax you. What's more, it'll make you feel good about yourself. Worried about wear and tear on your body? Try yoga or tai chi. They're both low-impact ways to work up a good sweat.

TALK IT OUT: Don’t be afraid to discuss your eating habits with your doctor or a mental health professional. They may be able to provide therapy and tips to help you identify what’s causing your stress. They can also give you ideas on how to make better food choices and reach your healthy goals.

REVIEWED BY: Jennifer Casarella, WebMD on May 11, 2020

REFERENCES:

Psychology Today: “Why Do We Eat?”

Mayo Clinic: “Weight Loss: Gain control of emotional eating," "Mood and Food: Break The Link," "Mediation: A simple, fast way to reduce stress."

Harvard Medical School: “Why stress causes people to overeat,” "“Why keep a food diary?” "“Exercising to relax.”

Weight Watchers: “Seven ways to take care of emotional eating,” "How to outsmart stress-eating.”

Much Love, Dr.Shermaine, #InformativeRead #PleaseShare #HealthyBodySoulAndSpirit #IWantYou2LiveWell #FeelFree2SignUpAndFollow

The Goal is to Always Make You Aware of What Concerns Your Body, Soul and Spirit, So You Can Have Open, Honest and Frequent Discussions With Your Physicians and Counselors. You Can’t Treat or Cure What You Don’t Know is Sick.
 
"It's Not Selfish to Love Yourself, Take Care of Yourself and to Make Your Happiness a Priority. It's a Necessity." (Mandy Hale)

"Self-Care is Not Selfish. You Cannot Serve From an Empty Vessel." (Eleanor Brown)

The contents of the WebMD and Self-Care With Dr. Shermaine Sites, such as text, graphics, images, and other material contained on the WebMD and Self-Care With Dr. Shermaine Sites ("Content") are for informational purposes only. The Content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on the WebMD and Self-Care With Dr. Shermaine Sites!

If you think you may have a medical emergency, call your doctor or 911 immediately. WebMD and Self-Care With Dr. Shermaine does not recommend or endorse any specific tests, physicians, products, procedures, opinions, or other information that may be mentioned on the Sites. Reliance on any information provided by WebMD, WebMD employees, others appearing on the Site at the invitation of WebMD, and Self-Care With Dr. Shermaine or other visitors to the Sites is solely at your own risk.  

“What Is Situational Depression?”

This form of depression is different than others—here's how to recognize it. 

Many people experience depression, but situational depression is a specific type of this mental health condition. It refers to feelings of sadness following a traumatic event in a person's life, such as a job loss, death of a loved one, or a serious illness diagnosis. Here's how experts explain situational depression, including the main symptoms, how it's treated, and how long it lasts.

WHAT IS SITUATIONAL DEPRESSION? Situational depression is not an official mental health diagnosis on its own. It's classified as an adjustment disorder; it makes it difficult for a person to adjust after experiencing trauma or a dramatic change in day-to-day life. Greg Simon, MD, MPH, a Washington-based psychiatrist at Kaiser Permanente, tells Health that situational depression follows an event that leaves a person feeling chronically stressed, upset, or bereaved, and compared to other types of depression tends to be more transient in nature. 

WHAT CAUSES IT? As the term implies, situational depression is a direct result of a stressful or traumatic situation. That can include dealing with the death of a loved one, loss of a job, divorce or a romantic breakup, a significant diagnosis of illness, or any other situation known to cause intense stress. Though not everyone who experiences a traumatic event will develop situational depression, those who are more prone to classic depression are more likely to have situational depression. “Some people are much more vulnerable to depression because of their genetics or life experiences following stress or traumatic events,” says Dr. Simon. “It's a combination of vulnerability and experience.”

WHAT ARE THE SYMPTOMS? Situational depression symptoms are similar to clinical depression symptoms, which include feelings of hopelessness, emptiness, and sadness as well as a lack of interest in activities a person used to enjoy. However, situational depression may also be marked by an irritable mood and coldness, especially toward the distressing situation. “With situational depression, the situation is so overwhelming that it's hard to face and you defend against it by being callous or cold, withdrawing, or getting angry,” Gerald Shiener, MD, chief of psychiatry at Detroit Medical Center tells Health. “Those are defenses against getting further discouraged by the situation.” These symptoms can evolve in severity if left untreated. 

HOW LONG DOES IT LAST? Situational depression can last anywhere from two weeks to months, depending on how affected a person is by the traumatic event. If left untreated, situational depression has the potential to evolve into major depressive disorder, which is another name for the classic depression people develop that doesn't have to be related to any specific trauma. According to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5), situational depression becomes chronic following six months of symptoms.

HOW IS IT TREATED? Like many other types of depression, situational depression can be treated with mental health counseling or psychotherapy in its early stages, though others may look to medication like selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors or dopamine reuptake inhibitors. A combination of both drugs has proven to be helpful, depending on the severity of situational depression. But counseling without medication could be the answer. “Often people who have situational depression know something is wrong and they look for help, and they respond better to counseling and talk about their experiences,” says Dr. Simon. “They're more likely to be helped that way, and not likely to require medication.” 

By: Taylyn Washington-Harmon, Health Magazine

Much Love, Dr.Shermaine, #InformativeRead #PleaseShare #HealthyBodySoulAndSpirit #IWantYou2LiveWell #FeelFree2SignUpAndFollow

The Goal is to Always Make You Aware of What Concerns Your Body, Soul and Spirit, So You Can Have Open, Honest and Frequent Discussions With Your Physicians and Counselors. You Can’t Treat or Cure What You Don’t Know is Sick.

"It's Not Selfish to Love Yourself, Take Care of Yourself and to Make Your Happiness a Priority. It's a Necessity." (Mandy Hale)

"Self-Care is Not Selfish. You Cannot Serve From an Empty Vessel." (Eleanor Brown)

The contents of the Health Magazine and Self-Care With Dr. Shermaine Sites, such as text, graphics, images, and other material contained on the Health Magazine and Self-Care With Dr. Shermaine Sites ("Content") are for informational purposes only. The Content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on the Health Magazine and Self-Care With Dr. Shermaine Sites!

If you think you may have a medical emergency, call your doctor or 911 immediately. Health Magazine and Self-Care With Dr. Shermaine does not recommend or endorse any specific tests, physicians, products, procedures, opinions, or other information that may be mentioned on the Sites. Reliance on any information provided by Health Magazine, Health Magazine employees, others appearing on the Site at the invitation of Health Magazine, and Self-Care With Dr. Shermaine or other visitors to the Sites is solely at your own risk.