“The 50 Best Marriage Tips From Couples Who've Been Married for 50+ Years!”

 

THIS RELATIONSHIP ADVICE IS THE KEY TO MAKING IT THROUGH ANYTHING.

When you first walk down the aisle, tons of people give you marriage tips like "never go to bed angry" and "remember that you're on the same team." Of course, during the honeymoon stage, that advice for a long, successful marriage doesn't seem very pressing. But with the rising number of couples over 50 calling it quits—these "gray divorces" now account for 25 percent of splits—it seems harder than ever to make a marriage really last until death do you part. So, what do those couples who do manage to make their unions last for decades know about love that the rest of us don't? From the small gestures that keep the romance alive to tips on overcoming the challenges most couples face, we've gathered the best marriage tips from those who've stuck it out for half a century. These are the keys to marital success.

 

1 LET YOUR PARTNER KNOW YOU'RE THINKING ABOUT THEM THROUGHOUT THE DAY: If you want your partner to feel both desirable and desired, make sure you're letting them know just how often they're on your mind. "Let your partner know you are thinking about them and putting them first in your mind," suggests Beverly B. Palmer, PhD, a professor of psychology, clinical psychologist, and author who has been married for 50 years.

2 AND LET THEM EXPRESS THEIR FEELINGS FIRST: Instead of always letting your partner know exactly how you're feeling first, make space for them to express themselves before you start sharing. "Understand your partner's point of view and let your partner know that," says Palmer. "After that, you can express yours."

3 ACCEPT YOUR PARTNER FOR WHO THEY ARE: Houses are fixer-uppers, but viewing your spouse that way is a recipe for disaster. "Accept your partner just for who they are. Don't try to change them," Palmer recommends. After all, people can only change if they want to. "Just accept their strengths and weaknesses that make them unique and that you love them for that."

4 IMAGINE WHAT YOUR LIFE WOULD REALLY BE LIKE WITHOUT THEM: Just because your relationship gets rocky from time to time doesn't mean you and your spouse aren't a good match—just try imagining life without them and you'll realize how important they are to you. "Sometimes, when I have a couple in counseling who are either antagonistic toward one another or apathetic, I tell them: 'Think about that you may not have tomorrow with the one you love,'" says Palmer. "'What would you wish you had said or done today that would have made a difference?'"

5 LEARN HOW TO COMPROMISE: Listen, all couples fight. But half the battle of marriage is knowing which fights to pick and which ones you should meet your spouse on halfway. "We compromise," says Anna Pallante, who has been married to her husband Aniello for 58 years. "When you love each other, you commit to make the bumpy road of life smoother together. When you do that each day, you put the love and each other first, instead of yourself. That keeps things peaceful."

6 BE PHYSICALLY AFFECTIONATE WITH ONE ANOTHER: Making your spouse feel loved sometimes means more than just listening to their wants and needs—physical affection is important, too. "A hug and a kiss go a long way," says artist Sheila Rechtshaffer, who has been married to her husband, Bert, for 56 years.

7 END THE NIGHT ON A POSITIVE NOTE: Before you turn in for the evening, make sure you and your spouse are on the same page about the disagreements you had earlier in the day. "Don't go to bed angry," says Bert.

8 ENJOY ONE ANOTHER'S COMPANY: With work, social commitments, and other family members competing for your time, it may be difficult to allocate one-on-one time with your spouse. But making a point to do so—and enjoying it—can make your relationship stronger in the long run. "One of the very most important things is enjoying doing things together," says Tom Wilbur, who has been married for 49 years.

9 MAINTAIN THE FRIENDSHIP IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP: As your relationship progresses, don't forget to maintain your friendship along with the romantic side of your relationship. "We have always been able to spend a great deal of time together and a true friendship was easily formed," says Barbara Adoff, who has been married to her husband Bill for 47 years. "Best friends are there for each other, support each other, and like to have fun together. I often tell my hubby I feel like we're having one very long sleepover."

10 LIVE IN THE MOMENT: Turning otherwise boring activities into small romantic opportunities can keep the passion alive, no matter how long you've been together. "Simply stopping at Wawa for a coffee on our way to run errands makes it special," says Barbara. "We often take time to make things fun or enjoy the moment. If a good song comes on at home we'll stop and dance, we go to the movies and for walks."

11 DECOMPRESS TOGETHER: Self-care is important—and performing those restorative acts with your partner can often make your relationship stronger along the way. "We manage to get into our hot tub most days and this relaxing down time is a treat," says Barbara. "Treats are being good to yourself and to each other."

12 MAKE EVERYTHING A DATE: Want to keep your marriage strong? Take any opportunity to spend time together. "Just going to the grocery store together should be treated like a date," says Barbara's husband, Bill.

13 MAKE SURE YOU HAVE THE SAME FINANCIAL PRIORITIES: While savers and spenders can happily coexist, it's important to see eye-to-eye on your longer-term financial goals to keep your marriage on steady footing. "The biggest problem long-term couples have is finances," says Bill. "Get on the same page right away. Don't let money get in the way."

14 HAVE A SENSE OF HUMOR ABOUT YOURSELF AND YOUR RELATIONSHIP: Sometimes, things don't work out the way you'd planned. Instead of picking a fight with your spouse or getting down, try having a good laugh about things. "Laugh at yourself and at each other," suggests Barbara. "Laugh with each other. Humor is the way to enjoy a marriage and to raise children."

15 DON'T BE AFRAID TO GIVE EACH OTHER SPACE: Space doesn't have to be a bad thing. Just because you want to spend time away from your partner doesn't mean you love or cherish them any less. "I credit still being married to living in a big house," Maureen McEwan, who's been married to her husband Tom for more than 50 years, told Good Housekeeping. "I need space. I need to know that I can be by myself and [have room to be] artistic."

16 KNOW THAT THE GRASS IS NOT ALWAYS GREENER: Many people end up unhappy in their marriage because they wonder, "What if there's someone better out there for me?" or "What if this is not the right path for me?" But most of the time, the answers to those questions are: "There isn't" and "It is." "My grandkids won't settle down because they think the grass is greener," Sheldon Y., who's been married for 50 years, told Elite Daily. "I met my wife and asked her to marry me three days later. When you know someone is right for you, settle down with them and don't let them go. The grass is never greener than love you foster over many years."

17 DON'T BE AFRAID TO SEEK PROFESSIONAL HELP: Seeking outside help is still a bit taboo in some circles where people assume marriage counseling insinuates their relationship is weak. However, it's actually quite the opposite. "I'm not Cinderella, and he's not Prince Charming," Sherri Sugarman, who's been married to her husband Charlie for more than 50 years, told Good Housekeeping. "Glitches along the way are normal because it's hard to live together all these years. We went to a marriage counselor at one point because we were going in different directions and needed professional help. You always have to keep working on the relationship."

18 REALIZE THAT YOU WILL FIGHT: Sometimes, people have an idolized view of marriage and think that one fight means the end is near. But the truth is, all couples fight—even the happy ones. "It's not all been easy years. Young people will say, 'Oh you almost never fight.' We say, 'No, au contraire, we fight all the time,'" Jim Owen, who's been married to his wife Stanya for 50 years, told Fatherly. "You can [keep your marriage alive], but it takes a lot of work. It's not just something that you can ho-him through life."

19 DON'T ALWAYS LIVE IN THE FUTURE: While it can be nice to envision your future with someone, if you're always focused on what's to come, you won't actually be appreciating your partner in the now—which leads to problems in the future. "I'm always surprised that young people who date for two weeks say, 'I think I finally met the one that I want to spend my life with!' It's almost like they visualize the next 5, 10, or 20 years. I don't think we've ever done that," Owen told Fatherly. "We don't live in the future. We don't think, 'It's going to be so much better once this or that event happens.'"

 

20 KNOW THAT NO MARRIAGE IS PERFECT: Basing your marriage off the marriage of anyone else can be a recipe for disaster. The only people you need to prove your marriage to are you and your partner, not the world. "I think one of the issues that young people face is that they look at social media, they listen to celebrity stuff, and they think that somewhere out there is a possibility of marriage made in heaven, where there are no issues. Like some people have the perfect marriage. And that's simply not true. Every family has issues," Owen explained to Fatherly.

 

21 ALWAYS KISS EACH OTHER GOODNIGHT: The world is full of surprises, and not all of them good, so make the most of every moment with your partner—especially at the end of the day. "Always kiss each other goodnight because you never know what tomorrow may bring," Joyce Smith Speares, who's been married to Benny DeWitt for more than 60 years, told Southern Living.

 

22 UNDERSTAND THAT PATIENCE IS A VIRTUE: It's true. If you hope for anything out of your spouse, hope for patience. "Patience has made our marriage resilient and has been one of the most important reasons that we are still living happily ever after, enjoying our golden years," Ann Yedowitz, who has been married to her husband Joe for more than 50 years, told Southern Living.

 

23 AND KNOW THAT YOU'RE A TEAM, NO MATTER WHAT: The secret to a happy, loving marriage? Knowing that you're in it together, as a team, no matter what either of you face individually. Once you're married, everything should be faced together. "I know Alan is there for me," Evelyn Brier told Good Housekeeping about her husband of more than 50 years. "I was sick with breast cancer [eight] years ago, and he was right there. It was important, and satisfying, to know that there's someone who genuinely cares about my wellbeing. That's what loves does."

24 FOCUS ON FRIENDSHIP, NOT JUST LUST: Being friends before you enter into a romantic relationship can help cement your bond decades down the line. "We were friends for several years before we started officially dating," explains Silvana Clark, an author and speaker who has been married for 42 years. "This gave us time to know each other and have a realistic understanding of our personalities, strengths, and weaknesses."

 

25 KEEP SAYING "YES" TO NEW EXPERIENCES: If you want your relationship to last, make "yes" a priority. "Marry someone who is fun to be with. Then throughout your marriage, say 'yes' to each other," suggests Clark. "'Yes, we can paint the dining room red if you want.' 'Yes, we can go to a musical, even though I don't like singing and tap dancing.' 'Yes, let's get a sheep to mow the yard because it takes too long to use a lawn mower.' We've found, by saying 'yes' to each other, our lives have been filled with new experiences and amazing times together."

 

26 DECIDE WHAT'S A DEALBREAKER BEFORE YOU TIE THE KNOT: Your spouse isn't likely to change just because you got married, so it's important to know what your dealbreakers are before you walk down the aisle. "Of course, we all have problems, but if you are thinking of marrying someone who drinks heavily when upset, is moody and has fits of rage, stay away!" says Clark. "Those traits won't disappear when you get married. Even marrying someone who is a homebody while you love to travel can be a factor in causing stress in a marriage."

 

27 REMINISCE ABOUT WHY YOU FIRST FELL IN LOVE: Your passion for one another may wax and wane over the years but remembering why you first fell in love can help pull you back in when you feel like you're drifting away from each other. "Keep close in your mind some poignant memories of the first rushes of love—when you knew that you never wanted to be far from this person, when your heart felt a physical jump at the sight of them," say Lewis and Marsha McGehee, who have been married for 44 years. "The daily obstacles will work out if the resolve to hold on to your love story is strong."

 

28 MAKE YOUR PARTNER FEEL WANTED: Knowing (and regularly hearing) that your spouse loves you is important, but knowing they want you can make your marriage last a lifetime. "Being attractive…means doing little things for each other and feeling needed and desired," says Lewis. "I want my spouse to want me."

 

29 MAINTAIN A LIFE OUTSIDE OF YOUR RELATIONSHIP: Codependence can quickly sour any relationship—and maintaining your personal interests outside the marriage might just be the key to enjoying a solid union. "I want my spouse to be engaged in a productive life and care about herself," says Lewis.

 

30 TAKE PRIDE IN YOUR APPEARANCE: "I think that maintaining physical attractiveness is also important," Lewis adds. "I don't mean just in a superficial way. Being attractive to your spouse means multiple things, like trying to stay in shape by working out. This has the added benefit of keeping one's mental attitude strong and positive."

 

31 DON'T LOOK FOR EXCUSES TO END THINGS: Throwing out the “D” word in arguments—or even thinking that this fight might be your last one—will inevitably cause tension in your marriage that you may be unable to fix. "Never go into an argument thinking that it could be the end of the relationship," the McGehees advise. "That means speaking your mind, but not saying or doing anything that is not recoverable. Healthy marriages are not always smooth but should always be respectful."

 

32 CELEBRATE ONE ANOTHER JUST BECAUSE: You shouldn't wait for holidays or anniversaries to celebrate all the wonderful things you love about your spouse. "I have always celebrated birthdays, anniversaries, and it simply being a Wednesday on what started as a crazy work week," says Carol Gee, author of Random Notes (About Life, "Stuff" And Finally Learning to Exhale), who has been married for 47 years. "Celebrate occasions, big and small. These celebrations don't have to be big deals—a cake and coffee to celebrate a birthday, or because it's Friday and you simply love being together."

 

33 KEEP YOUR SPOUSE GUESSING: Keeping your spouse on their toes can go a long way. "One day I asked my husband what he thought the secret to our marriage was," says Gee. "A quiet man of little words, he said, 'I never know what you are going to do from one minute to the next, and I find I like that.'"

 

34 MAKE INTIMACY A PRIORITY OUTSIDE THE BEDROOM: Having an amazing sex life can keep both partners interested but exploring intimacy outside the confines of the bedroom is equally important. "Intimacy is more than sex," says Gee. "It's holding hands, it's kissing each other good morning and goodbye. It's spending time together without outside distractions, cell phones, televisions, that sort of thing."

 

35 PERFORM SMALL GESTURES OF KINDNESS ON A REGULAR BASIS: Over time, many people get so used to their partners being around that they no longer feel the need to perform those little acts of kindness, like pulling out chairs, holding an umbrella for one another, or tackling a chore just so their significant other doesn't have to. "No matter how long we have been married, my husband holding doors open for me makes me feel special," says Gee.

 

36 HAVE A DAILY MEALTIME CHECK-IN: Sharing at least one daily device-free meal can make all the difference when it comes to the health of your relationship. "We have always tried to eat at least one meal together daily," says Gee. "As a working couple (before both retiring) with different work hours, it's typically dinner. Not only do we enjoy a meal together, but we also use this time to talk about our day."

 

37 AND MAKE DINNER AT HOME A SPECIAL OCCASION: Even if you're just heating up last night's leftovers, you can make meals with your spouse feel like a special occasion every night of the week. Light some candles, open a bottle of good wine, or put on a romantic playlist to set the mood. "Casseroles more often than not are served in our dining room on good china," says Gee.

 

38 KEEP THE ROMANCE ALIVE: Sweeping your significant other off their feet is something that can keep those fires lit even after you've been together for decades. "I plan trips where he only has to pack his bag," Gee says. "He, on the other hand, will surprise me by bringing home dinner, or buying the lottery scratch-offs that I adore, and hiding them where I can find them. The unusual locations—such as in the dishes in the cabinet or hidden in our bed—show the thought he puts in just because it tickles me when I find them."

 

39 LEARN WHAT YOU WANT IN BED—AND DON'T BE AFRAID TO TELL YOUR PARTNER: If you want to keep your relationship strong over the years, make sure you're letting your partner know what you want in the bedroom—especially if it's changed over time. "We have learned how to excite each other and how to please each other," says Beverly Solomon, a creative director who has been married for 44 years. "As your love grows, so does the quality of your sexual intimacy. As you age, you really appreciate the shared pleasures of true love."

40 SHOW GRATITUDE: Being thankful can help put things into perspective, keeping you and your spouse from spiraling into despair just because things aren't going the way you expected. "[We] give thanks every day for the blessings we have and for the blessings to come," says Solomon.

 

41 KEEP COMPANY WITH POSITIVE PEOPLE: Want to see your relationship through a rosier lens? Try spending time with friends who share your positive outlook on life. "We avoid negative people and negative situations," Solomon notes. "Being around negative people with negative outlooks can poison your life."

 

42 TAKE TIME TO COOL OFF IF THINGS ARE GETTING TOO HEATED: If you find yourself getting a little bit too passionate during an argument with your spouse, it's often better to back off for the time being and return to the discussion later when you're feeling calmer. "We have disagreements—as all couples do," says Solomon. But, she adds, "if one or both of us feels that we are too upset to discuss an issue in a sane and respectful way, we give ourselves some time to cool down."

 

43 AND DON'T LET YOUR ARGUMENTS SPILL OVER INTO OTHER RELATIONSHIPS: While venting to your friends about your spouse's seeming inability to pick up their socks may be cathartic, spilling the intimate details of what's going wrong in your marriage every time you and your partner disagree may do more harm than good. "We never badmouth each other to others," says Solomon.

 

44 LEARN TO TUNE OUT THE NOISE: Learning to not let others' opinions and advice infiltrate your marriage will keep you and your spouse in sync as time goes by. "When we were first married, there were many expectations placed on us by our parents," says Dana Kichen, a real estate agent who has been married for 42 years. "After four years of tug and pull, we moved out of state and learned to totally rely on each other. This has continued throughout our marriage."

 

45 SPEAK USING "I" STATEMENTS WHEN YOU ARGUE: Instead of enumerating the many ways your partner has upset you, present those issues from your perspective using "I" statements, like, "I feel hurt when you're on your phone when I'm talking to you." "This allows discussion without putting the other person on the defensive, and therefore avoids the escalation of an argument," explains Kichen.

 

46 LEARN TO REALLY APOLOGIZE: Apologizing to your partner is essential for keeping your marriage strong and healthy over the years—but that doesn't always mean concession after a big fight. "Saying 'I'm sorry' does not have to mean 'I was wrong,'" Kichen points out. "It can refer to being sorry for hurting feelings, shouting—anything. This allows you to put hurt feelings aside and go on without one person being right and the other wrong."

 

47 SAY NO TO DISTRACTIONS WHEN YOU'RE COMMUNICATING WITH ONE ANOTHER: When you're having heart-to-hearts with your spouse, it's important to make sure they're your number one priority—not what's on TV, not the laundry in the dryer, and not what's on your phone. "What makes our relationship work is trying not to multi-task when we are communicating with each other," says author Bracha Goetz, who has been married for 40 years. "And when we try to focus on each other completely when communicating, it's like we are in the middle of a first exciting date forever."

 

48 DON'T BRING WORK INTO THE RELATIONSHIP: When work stress spills over into your relationship or relationship stress spills over into your work life, it's a recipe for disaster. "We both did our own thing," says Gayle Carson, a life coach who was married for 45 years before her husband passed away. "I had my own business and eventually my husband had his. We didn't interfere with each other and when we came together, it was glorious."

49 PURSUE SOME OF THE SAME INTERESTS: Having a few activities you both love can mean the difference between decades of marital bliss and seemingly endless strife. "We did have common interests for entertainment," says Carson. "Every weekend was spent water skiing, swimming, and out in the boat. We loved going to movies, eating out, and watching TV."

 

50 BUT REMEMBER THAT OPPOSITES ATTRACT: While enjoying some of the same things certainly makes it easier to spend time together, don't operate under the assumption that you have to share a personality to happily share a life together. "Although I was the extrovert and he the introvert, it worked because we didn't push each other in either direction," says Carson.

 

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“25 Genius Ways Fitness Trainers Stay Motivated to Exercise”

 

The smart tricks personal trainers and fitness instructors use to drag themselves to the gym—because even your perky Pilates instructor needs a pick-me-up once in a while.

SECRETS TO STAYING MOTIVATED: If it were easy to stay motivated to work out, then we'd all have rock-hard abs. Alas, the drive to get out of bed for an early morning sweat session is elusive, except for those infectiously positive and perky fitness trainers and instructors—or so you thought. Even they need some encouragement once in a while. We asked four inspiring exercise experts to share what motivates them both in and out of the gym and studio. Their advice could be the extra nudge you need.

TAKE A NEW CLASS: Your favorite instructors are great teachers, but they're still students, too. "Just like my clients, I oftentimes need to be told what to do when it comes to my exercise routine," says Annie Mulgrew, program director at CityRow in New York City. "I'll take a class at my studio or another studio with an instructor friend," she says. "I always feel better afterward!" Mulgrew says group fitness is more than just a workout, but an opportunity to see what other instructors are doing and get new ideas. "We're still consumers of group fitness."

TREAT YOURSELF EVERY DAY: To stay on track with a healthy, balanced diet, Mulgrew says she gives in to temptation one time every day. "If I allow myself a treat, I'm way less likely to overindulge or binge," she says. "One glass of wine is perfect, but a whole bottle? Derailing." This smart eating strategy is the reason many authorities say trendy or restrictive diets simply don’t work. You end up craving the self-banned food even more, increasing your odds of binge eating or falling off the wagon completely.

PUMP UP THE JAMS: Music can be an incredibly powerful mood booster. In fact, research has shown that listening to happy or sad music can actually directly alter the way you perceive the world—powerful stuff! Los Angeles-based personal trainer Astrid Swan harnesses the power of music to get her ready to take on the world. "No matter what the situation is—an early wake-up call, sprints on the treadmill, or just having a life moment, music brings me back to me," says Swan. Need a quick jolt? She says to turn up the dial "on the volume and on your workout." One song that always works for this fitness pro: "Stronger" by Britney Spears.

GIVE YOURSELF A PEP TALK: Whether it's a family member's words of encouragement that have stuck with you, or lyrics from a familiar song, keeping a mantra, catchphrase or motto handy when you need a boost of confidence or determination can work wonders. For Swan it's simply "Let's go! I've got this." "If I'm going into a meeting, or totally dying during a workout session, I'll say it [to myself]," she says. "I say it to my clients, too! 'You've got this. You just have to believe'."

PLAN A POST-WORKOUT MEAL: Having a food in mind for your post-workout nosh will motivate you to crush your sweat session. Erin Bulvanoski, trainer at KORE New York, says it helps her really work for that snack she's craving. "I love finding a great smoothie shop after class," she says. "It's something I get excited about." That said, don't overdo it—remember these tips for avoiding a post-workout binge.

CONNECT WITH FRIENDS: A workout buddy holds you accountable for the time and effort you put into your workouts—research proves it. Plus, socializing as you sweat can make exercise more fun. Bulvanoksi says she enjoys staying connected to and touching base with her favorite clients. "I love inviting my friends to join me in class, too," she says. "The more people I have to look forward to see, the more I feel motivated to be at the top of my game.”

PRACTICE BEING MINDFUL: The art of being in the moment, blocking out all the external day-to-day stressors that can get in the way is sometimes easier said than done, but this kind of mindfulness is something Daniela Iannone, personal trainer and instructor at Prime Cycle in Hoboken, New Jersey truly believes in and follows. "For many people in my class, the 45 minutes they spend with me is the only time during their day that they have to themselves," Iannone says. "I tell them to give that to themselves and focus on the task at hand. Where your mind goes, your energy goes with it."

SURROUND YOURSELF WITH POSITVE PEOPLE: Mulgrew says spending time with positive, hard-working co-workers and friends makes her want to follow their lead. "If I'm having a rough day, my team keeps me focused on the good, and helps me power through," she says. It's nice to surround yourself with friends who have similar interests, but Mulgrew says it's just as important to be with people who are doing things you want to be doing. If you see other people living healthfully, those actions could become habits for you, too. "If you have someone helping you to stay consistent, it's a game-changer," says Mulgrew.

LISTEN TO YOUR BODY: Your body could be telling you things you may not want to hear. Mulgrew says that sometimes her body wants to push her out of her comfort zone. "So, I look around at other people at the gym or in class and tell myself if they can do it, so can I." Other times though, your body might be warning you to stop. "There's nothing wrong with taking a break, and there's nothing less motivating than an injury," says Mulgrew. "If my body feels too fatigued or I feel discomfort in my muscles or joints, I back off. Staying safe and healthy allows for longevity, and that's really what it's all about.”

GET IN THOSE STEPS FOR THE DAY: You signed up for spin class only to realize it was at the location across town. Instead of dreading the commute, make good use of that time! "Sometimes to get motivated for class, I force myself to run, walk, or bike there instead of taking the subway as a way to get my blood flowing and endorphins up," says Bulvanoski. Studies have shown that exercising outdoors (or in this case, taking the scenic route to class) offers bonus benefits like improved mood and, weather permitting, an extra dose of Vitamin D.

THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU CAN ACCOMPLISH RIGHT NOW: You might have a larger goal in mind—dropping pounds, training for a marathon—but it's crucial to remember all the baby steps it takes to get there. During her high-intensity classes, Bulvanoski asks clients to set goals for themselves that they aim to complete during the hour-long class, and she sets one for herself, too. "Tangible things to achieve are always a stronger motivator to be at your best," she says.

WATCH YOURSELF: The floor-to-ceiling mirrors surrounding most studios are not there to torture you. Sure, you may feel a little awkward while you're getting the hang of a particularly challenging move, but looking in the mirror can help perfect your form over time. The mirror helps show Bulvanoski just how hard she's working. "Seeing my muscles work is a huge motivator," she says. "The more fun and fitted I can get my workout clothes, the more I can clearly see the goals I'm trying to achieve—and look good [while] doing it!"

DRINK MORE MATCHA: A caffeine jolt before the gym may enhance exercise results. In an International Journal of Sport Nutrition and Exercise Metabolism study, trained athletes who took in caffeine pre-exercise burned about 15% more calories for three hours post-exercise, compared to those who ingested a placebo. If you're not much of a coffee drinker but still want a quick caffeine fix, try matcha, a powdered form of green tea. "A matcha green tea latte with almond milk is my go-to," says Swan. "It's my only caffeine intake, so I get a surge of energy!" The spotlight on matcha has grown brighter recently, and for good reason. Because you are drinking the whole tea leaves (instead of only steeping them) matcha drinks are a more potent source of nutrients than traditional teas. Matcha is rich in antioxidants that may protect against heart disease and cancer, as well as help regulate blood sugar and blood pressure.

SCROLL THROUGH YOUR NEWSFEED: "Sometimes I check in on fitness hashtags on Instagram to see what other people are doing," says Iannone. "Seeing bodies in motion and images of strength motivates me." Remember the point is not to compare yourself to others (everyone's health journey and physique is different). Instead think about what or who inspires you to get moving and believe in yourself, and then follow instructors, trainers, or studios on social media for some fitspiration. It's not a bad idea to follow your favorite magazines either (cough, @healthmagazine).

THINK ABOUT HOW YOU’LL FEEL AFTER: "I work out for my sanity, not vanity," says Swan. "Workouts are my therapy. I know if I don't get to release those endorphins, I'm not as carefree." Exercise has long been shown to have lasting mental health benefits well after you complete a workout. Activity (even just a walk around the block) is said to reduce stress, boost your mood, and improve self-esteem. Those awesome psychological effects should be motivation enough to get you up and out.

BE THANKFUL: It's all too easy to get caught up in your own problems, frustrations, or never-ending to-do list, but Iannone finds it helpful to back away from complaints and consider what she has to be thankful for. She reminds herself and her clients that they each have the basic ability to move. "Be grateful that you have two legs that work," she says. "Don't take that for granted." It's this gratitude that keeps Iannone moving forward each day. "I think about people who can't move, and it puts everything in perspective for me.”

SET THE MOOD: What wakes Iannone up in the morning? Techno. Admittedly not a morning person, she says she prefers energetic music in the early hours to pump her up. "Music is fuel for your body," she says. "Feed the excitement and passion to keep going forward." Although the beat gets her moving in the morning, lyrics help maintain her drive. In one of Iannone's favorite songs, "The Fire" by The Roots, she loves the lyrics "I am the definition of tragedy turned triumph," which she says remind her of overcoming adversity and not giving up.

GO SHOPPING – DRESS THE PART: They say when you look good, you feel good. Sounds like an excuse to go shopping! And Swan is definitely on board, "I'm not going to lie, a new gym outfit gives me motivation," she says. "Brand new spandex or a killer sports bra is just like buying the perfect little black dress." More than just retail therapy, stepping into fun new workout wear could be just the boost of self-love you need in order to stick to a weight loss goal or rigorous training schedule. And new research suggests that dressing for an activity can actually boost your performance of a task. So hopefully if you dress like a tennis pro, you'll play like one, too.

TAKE A BREATHER: Sundays are typically rest days for Swan, but if you happen to find her in the gym that day, it's not because she's working out seven days a week. "I give my body a full day's rest no matter what," she says. "Physically, it's the best time for your muscles to recover, and it's so important for your muscles to be able to grow, but a full day's rest is going to rest your mind, too. Allow yourself to decompress." Schedule rest days just as you would workouts to avoid overuse injuries and ample time for muscle repair. And remember, a good rest mentally and physically prepares you to bring your A game to the next workout.

CHANGE YOUR MIND: There is no such thing as a quick-fix solution for your health and fitness goals, reminds Iannone, and she believes the first step starts inside you. "It's not just about working out," she says. "It's about working within." The fitness philosophy by which she lives and teaches encompasses this theory: "Change your mindset to change your life!" you'll often hear her screaming to a packed spin studio. "You have to approach fitness and life from a strong, positive, persistent place. Be brave in all that you do."

EAT OFTEN: You hate being hangry just as much as your friends hate to be around someone who's irritable from a rumbling stomach and low blood sugar. Avoid that feeling and make sure you have the energy needed to take on your next workout by eating throughout the day. The key is to think small, satisfying snacks, not full, heavy meals. Swan says she eats every three hours, which means she prepares for her day and any possible delays the night before. She chops fresh fruit and veggies, and grabs to-go almond butter, Greek yogurt, and raw nuts to put in a cooler she takes in the car.

SET ATTAINABLE GOALS: Setting an extremely lofty, unrealistic, or unhealthy goal is just setting yourself up for failure or exhaustion, says Mulgrew. "If you don't make the progress you want to see in the short-term, you could say 'oh this doesn't work, so I just won't do it'," she warns. The key thing for her to remember and what she tells clients is that consistency and longevity are more important than a looming right-now goal. "My goal is to live a healthy lifestyle, and to be an active human," she says. "Resting for a day or going for a walk, in the long run, doesn't matter. There's so much room for breaks.

GRAB A PEN: A journal is a place for Iannone to hold her sudden inspirations. "I come up with phrases or mantras that pop into my mind and write them down or create a [digital] poster to share with my followers online," she says. Feeling unmotivated? Look back on all those positive vibes you wrote before. You might know that food journaling or recording your food intake throughout the day can help you lose weight. But did you know regularly jotting down your feelings could have positive effects on your mind as well? Journaling has been shown to help manage anxiety, reduce stress, and prioritize your feelings by acting as a healthy outlet to express emotions.

FIGHT BOREDOM: You've probably heard an instructor tell you that if a move or class doesn't challenge you, it doesn't change you. Not only are they referring to the physiological effects from exercise, but they're also warning you against complacency. Mix things up to avoid the same old routine or you'll quickly become bored and unmotivated. "If I start to get bored, I know something needs to be adjusted," says Iannone. "I take it back to the books, the images, and the music because that's what works best for me.”

DO WHAT YOU LOVE: Although Iannone stopped formally practicing dance by the time she entered adulthood, that passion for movement and activity is what ultimately led her to pursue a career in fitness. "It was health-related and kept me mobile," she says. "I get to see different people every day and stay moving. This work makes me better." Think about some of your favorite hobbies or activities. Even if you don't turn that passion into a career like Iannone, it's important to maintain your connection to what makes the best healthy, happy version of you.

BY: Alyssa Sparacino, Health Magazine, November 04, 2015

Much Love, Dr.Shermaine, #InformativeRead #PleaseShare #HealthyBodySoulAndSpirit #IWantYou2LiveWell #FeelFree2SignUpAndFollow

The Goal is to Always Make You Aware of What Concerns Your Body, Soul and Spirit, So You Can Have Open, Honest and Frequent Discussions With Your Physicians and Counselors. You Can’t Treat or Cure What You Don’t Know is Sick.
 
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