"Superfoods That Fight Colds and Flu"

 

Trying to avoid colds and flu? From oysters to sweet potatoes, these foods can help.

BOOST YOUR IMMUNITY: They say you are what you eat, so it makes sense that eating healthy foods can help you stay, ER, healthy. "You can't underestimate the importance of good nutrition when it comes to...your immune system," says Karen Ansel, RD, a spokesperson for the Academy of Nutrition and Dietetics. "Vitamins, minerals, antioxidants—these are what keeps your body strong, and without them you're not giving your body the edge it needs to ward off infection." And we're not talking just fruits and vegetables: Foods from every food group are represented here. Make them a part of your diet for your best defense against colds and flu.

FISH: Oily fish—including salmon, tuna, and mackerel—are rich in omega-3 fatty acids, compounds that help reduce harmful inflammation in the body. Chronic inflammation prevents your immune system from working properly, and can contribute to colds and flu as well as more serious diseases.
Omega 3s may fight colds on more than one front. In a placebo-controlled 2011 study published in Brain, Behavior and Immunity, medical students who took fish oil supplements for three months had lower inflammation levels and also fewer symptoms of anxiety—a condition that can itself weaken immune function.

OYSTERS: Zinc, an essential mineral, has a strong track record of fighting the common cold. A comprehensive review of the research, published in a Canadian medical journal in 2012, concluded that taking zinc lozenges appears to shorten the duration of cold symptoms in adults. Zinc supplements carry a risk of side effects such as nausea and headaches, however. A better bet, says Ansel, may be to get zinc straight from your diet. Oysters contain more of the nutrient per serving than any other food—but if you're concerned about staying healthy, you might not want to eat them raw. "Uncooked shellfish could contain harmful bacteria that could make you sick in other ways," Ansel says.

GARLIC: These pungent cloves do more than just flavor your food. Garlic also contains allicin, a sulfuric compound that produces potent antioxidants when it decomposes. A 2001 study in the journal Advances in Therapy found that people who took garlic supplements for 12 weeks between November and February got fewer colds than those who took a placebo. And of those who did get sick, those who took the garlic supplement felt better faster. Garlic packs the biggest antioxidant punch when eaten raw. Flavor too strong for you? Consider taking aged-garlic extract capsules.

ANISE SEEDS: These licorice-flavored seeds, which have antibacterial properties, have been shown to ease coughing and help clear congestion from the upper respiratory tract. Anise seeds can be eaten (in rolls and cookies, for instance), but for cold-fighting the delivery method of choice is usually tea. According to the American Pharmaceutical Association's Practical Guide to Natural Medicines, a typical recipe is to add one cup of crushed anise seeds to one cup of hot water, and flavor with sugar, garlic, cinnamon, or honey (if desired). Sip this concoction up to three times a day.

CITRUS FRUITS: Recent research suggests that vitamin C may not be as useful in preventing colds as once thought. However, studies do show that taking the vitamin at the first sign of illness may reduce a cold's duration by about a day, which can feel like a lifetime when you're suffering. Eating lots of citrus—whether that entails digging in to orange and grapefruit slices, or using lemons and limes in recipes—will provide plenty of this powerhouse nutrient. Don't worry about overdoing it, since it's very hard to overdose on vitamin C. Anything your body doesn't use is just washed right out of your system.

FENNEL: Like anise seeds, fennel is a natural expectorant, and can help clear chest congestion and soothe a persistent cough. The two foods have similar flavors, in fact, and in supermarkets fennel is sometimes referred to as anise, even though they're different plants. Fennel can be eaten raw or roasted, but you may get the best cold-fighting benefit from drinking a tea made from fennel seeds. Try Yogi Tea's Throat Comfort, or make your own with 1.5 teaspoons of fennel seeds and one cup boiling water. Steep for 15 minutes, strain, and sweeten with honey to taste.

YOGURT AND KEFIR: We usually think of bacteria as a bad thing, but some of these microorganisms are essential for good health. Eating probiotic foods, such as yogurt and kefir, is a good way to replenish beneficial strains of bacteria, which promote digestive health and help prevent stomach ailments. "There are over 10 trillion bacteria living in our gastrointestinal tract, so you want to make sure the good ones outnumber the bad ones," Ansel says. The benefits of good bacteria may go beyond our gut. A 2011 review of the research found that consuming probiotics—whether in food or supplement form—lowers the risk of upper respiratory tract infections better than a placebo.

TEA: Everyone knows a steaming hot cup of tea can help break up chest congestion and soothe a sore throat, but the benefits may run deeper. All tea—black, green, or white—contains a group of antioxidants known as catechins, which may have flu-fighting properties. In a 2011 Japanese study, people who took catechin capsules for five months had 75% lower odds of catching the flu than people taking a placebo. Need another reason to turn on the kettle? Other research suggests catechins may help boost overall immunity, rev metabolism, and protect against cancer and heart disease.

RED PEPPERS: Like citrus fruits, red peppers are high in vitamin C. In fact, one red pepper has 150 milligrams of the nutrient—that's twice the recommended daily allowance for women. (A large orange, by comparison, only has about 100 milligrams.) Even that may not be enough, however, as studies suggest you need much more than that to harness the nutrient's cold-fighting benefits. "If you're sick, you should be eating a lot of vitamin C throughout the day—400 to 500 milligrams," Ansel says.

MILK: Much of the vitamin D that our bodies need to build strong bones, defend against heart disease, and—you guessed it—bolster our immune system is produced when the sun's rays interact with our skin cells. But this key vitamin is also found in fortified foods such as milk, orange juice, and breakfast cereal. Getting your daily dose of vitamin D may keep colds at bay. A 2009 study from Massachusetts General Hospital found that lower vitamin D levels were associated with a greater risk of upper respiratory infections. In 2012, the same researchers found that Vitamin D supplements can help ward off kids’ winter colds, as well.

MUSHROOMS: When it comes to mushrooms, your choices are many: White button, Portobello, shiitake, and Maitake are just a few of the varieties you'll find in your grocery store. Fortunately, just about all mushrooms contain some form of immune-boosting antioxidants, along with potassium, B vitamins, and fiber. Shiitakes, for example, contain lentinan, a nutrient that is thought to have anticancer properties. Other varieties, such as certain brands of Portobello, are grown in ultraviolet light to spur vitamin D production.

SKINLESS TURKEY BREAST: Lean proteins, such as turkey breast with the skin removed, are high on Ansel's list of flu fighters. "We think we need protein to build muscle, and we do—but actually, we need it to build antibodies and fight infection in the body, as well," she says. Chicken, turkey, and pork are all good sources of protein, but you can also get plenty from meatless sources such as beans, nuts, and dairy.

LEAFY GREENS: The darker the greens, the higher the nutrient content. So when you're shoring up your defenses for cold and flu season, choose arugula and kale over iceberg lettuce. Bitter greens like arugula may even help relieve chest congestion, sniffles, and coughs. How? It's not entirely clear, although a 2011 British study found that mice that were fed green vegetables had more infection-fighting white blood cells in their intestines than those who were not.

BLUEBERRIES: These antioxidant powerhouses are bite-sized immunity boosters, especially when they grow in the wild. In 2007, Cornell University scientists found that wild blueberries contained the most active antioxidants of any fresh fruit, thanks to their high levels of anthocyanins—one of the most potent antioxidants.

DARK CHOCOLATE: Ounce for ounce, pure cocoa contains more of the disease-fighting antioxidants known as polyphenols than most berries—and it's loaded with zinc, to boot. Too often, however, the nutritional benefits of cocoa are overshadowed by the sugar and saturated fat found in chocolate bars and other treats. To reap the immunity-boosting benefits without the unhealthy extras, stick with bite-sized portions—about one quarter-ounce per day—of dark chocolate with a cocoa content of 70% or higher.

BRAZIL NUTS: These rich, creamy nuts are high in protein, healthy fats, and selenium, a mineral that's essential for proper immune function and may help guard against infections and flu. In a 2001 study, University of North Carolina researchers found that mice infected with the flu virus showed higher levels of inflammation if they were deficient in selenium. Your body only needs a small amount of selenium, though, and getting too much may actually raise your risk for certain diseases. Just one nut contains more than a day's recommended value, so eat these treats sparingly.

CARROTS AND SWEET POTATOES: Orange fruits and vegetables, such as carrots and sweet potatoes, are rich in beta-carotene. When we eat these foods, our bodies convert this organic compound into vitamin A, which is essential for maintaining a strong immune system. Vitamin A is especially important for areas that go haywire when we catch a cold: It keeps the mucous membranes that line our nose and throat—one of the body's first lines of defense—healthy and functioning properly.

SUNFLOWER SEEDS: These crunchy snacks are among the best natural sources of vitamin E, an antioxidant that protects cell walls from damage; a single one-ounce serving contains 30% of your recommended daily intake. (For a healthier choice, be sure to choose dry-roasted seeds over those roasted in oil.) Vitamin E may be especially important for the health of our lungs, where it appears to fight the harmful process known as oxidative stress. A 2003 study in Scotland found that people with diets high in vitamins C and E had greater lung capacity and produced less phlegm.

OATS: Whether you eat them in a bowl or a bar, oats contain a type of fiber called beta-glucan, known for its cholesterol-lowering and immune-boosting properties. Animal studies have shown that beta-glucan from oats can help prevent upper respiratory tract infection, and a few controlled trials have suggested that beta-glucan consumption can alter white blood cell activity in humans, as well.

By Amanda MacMillan, Health Magazine

Much Love, Dr.Shermaine #InformativeRead #PleaseShare #HealthyBodySoulAndSpirit

"It's Not Selfish to Love Yourself, Take Care of Yourself and to Make Your Happiness a Priority. It's a Necessity." (Mandy Hale)

"Self-Care is Not Selfish. You Cannot Serve From an Empty Vessel." (Eleanor Brown)

 

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"21 Important Facts About Vitamin B12 Deficiency"

 

You can eat a ton of veggies and still not get enough vitamin B12. Here are the risks, symptoms, and ways to treat a deficiency.

THE ENERGY VITAMIN: Vitamin B12 is a powerhouse. It helps make DNA, nerve and blood cells, and is crucial for a healthy brain and immune system. Your metabolism wouldn't run smoothly without it. But B12 isn't like other vitamins. It's only found in animal products like eggs, meat, shellfish, and dairy. Up to 15% of people don't get enough B12, and they're more likely to be vegetarians, have celiac disease or other digestion problems, or be an adult over 50. The signs of vitamin B12 deficiency include exhaustion, rapid heartbeat, brain fog, and other symptoms, says Maggie Moon, RD, a Los Angeles–based nutritionist and owner of Everyday Healthy Eating. Read on to find out more about the causes, symptoms, and cures for a vitamin B12 deficiency.

VEGETARIANS AND VEGANS ARE AT RISK: Vitamin B12 occurs naturally in animal products. So if your diet largely consists of plant-based foods such as fruits, veggies, beans, and soy, you're at risk for deficiency. "Vegetarians who consume eggs and dairy should aim to include at least one source a day from both of these food groups," says Stephanie Middleberg, R.D., nutritionist at Middleberg Nutrition in New York City. Vegans—who by definition consume no animal products—need to take a supplement or consume vitamin B12–fortified foods, such as breakfast cereal and grains. Other foods fortified with B12 include nondairy milks and meat substitutes, but not all are, so check the label first to make sure.

ADULTS OVER 50 ARE ALSO AT RISK: As you age, the stomach produces less acid, and stomach acid is key for B12 absorption, says Middleberg. About one in 31 adults over 50 are deficient, estimates the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. "Older individuals also often have poorer appetites and food intakes, and they may be on medications (such as heartburn med's) that can further reduce stomach acid levels," she says. In fact, some seniors actually lose the ability to absorb vitamin B12 from food at all, and must get it via supplements or, if the deficiency is severe, injections.

EARLY SYMPTOMS INCLUDE WEAKNESS AND FATIGUE: B12 isn't nicknamed the energy vitamin for nothing. Inadequate B12 intake makes a dent in red blood cell production, and some of the earliest signs of a deficiency include feeling dragged, confused, and weak. Problem is, says Middleberg, these clues are so vague, and not everyone experiences them the same way. And since they can be attributed to so many other possible triggers, most people don't think to be tested. If these symptoms hit and stick around for weeks, it's best to consult your doctor and rule out other causes, she says. Similar tip-offs include dizziness, impaired thinking, and confusion.

HEARTBURN DRUGS CAN CAUSE IT: Some prescription heartburn drugs suppress the production of stomach acid, which is needed to absorb vitamin B12. A 2013 study from the Journal of the American Medical Association backs this up. Researchers found that taking meds called proton pump inhibitors (like Prilosec and Nexium) for more than two years was linked to a 65% higher risk of vitamin B12 deficiency. And two years or more using H2 receptor blocker drugs (such as Pepcid and Zantac) is associated with a 25% boost in deficiency odds. If you take these regularly, talk to your doctor about steps you can take to protect yourself.

IT CAN BE MISTAKEN FOR DEMENTIA: "Symptoms of a deficiency often mimic those of dementia, such as memory loss, disorientation, and difficulty thinking and reasoning," says Middleberg. It can be hard distinguishing deficiency from dementia, especially since older folks are at risk for both. And the two conditions often overlap; 75% to 90% of B12 deficient people also have neurological complications such as dementia, says Moon. But even when a B12 shortage strikes younger people, it still typically resembles dementia. Experts aren't exactly sure of the relationship between the two, but patients with unexplained cognitive decline should be tested for B12 deficiency, suggests Moon.

TAKING BIRTH CONTROL PILLS SETS YOU UP FOR IT: "Women who have been on oral contraceptives for extended periods of time tend to have issues absorbing vitamin B12," says Middleberg. "Studies show that pills that are higher in estrogen are more strongly associated with B12 and folate (folic acid, or vitamin B6) deficiencies, leading to the assumption that the estrogen in the pill is the reason for this impaired absorption." If you're on the pill, talk to your doctor about the risks, and if you should take B12 supplements as a backup.

THE BEST SOURCES ARE MEAT AND FISH: Beef liver and clams are tops in B12, according to the National Institutes of Health. If you're not a fan of either, plenty of good options abound. Beef, turkey, oysters, chicken, trout, and salmon are B12 superstars; a serving of each delivers close to or more than 100% of your RDA (2.4 mcg for men and women over 14, going up to 2.6 and 2.8 for pregnant and breastfeeding women respectively, says Moon). Eggs (0.6 mcg per egg, 10% of daily value) and milk (1.2 mcg per cup of low-fat, 18% of daily value) are also solid sources.

FORTIFIED FOODS AND SUPPLEMENTS CAN HELP: Both can help vegans, vegetarians, and older adults and others who are unable to absorb naturally occurring B12, says Moon. When absorption is an issue, "simply loading up on foods naturally high in B12 may not solve the problem," she says. "The synthetic form of B12 is more readily absorbed." Best places to find it in food: fortified cereals, many of which have 100% of your RDA.

HEAVY DRINKING INCREASES YOUR ODDS: More than a few drinks on average each day can cause gastritis, or irritation of the stomach lining, and this can lead to low stomach acid and reduced B12 absorption, says Middleberg. Alcohol plays a role in deficiency in another way too. B12 is stored in the liver, and alcohol consumption can impair liver function and deplete B12 stores or make it harder for the liver to use it.

IT CAN TRIGGER A FALSE POSITIVE ON A PAP TEST: Vitamin B12 deficiency even affects the Pap test you get at your regular GYN checkup to screen for cervical cancer. Low B12 levels can change the way some cervical cells look, potentially triggering a false positive, according to the National Institutes of Health. Yet another reason to shore up your intake of the nutrient.

IT’S LINKED TO PERNICIOUS ANEMIA: There's a specific type of anemia that's triggered by a B12 deficiency. Called pernicious (which means "dangerous," because it was potentially life-threatening in the past) anemia, it is a red blood cell deficiency that happens when the stomach doesn't make enough of a protein called intrinsic factor, which helps the intestine absorb B12, says Moon. Pernicious anemia can be the result of an autoimmune issue, a problem with the stomach lining, or even a congenital condition passed down through families. Treatment usually involves B12 shots, possibly combined with supplements.

IT CAN BE HARD TO RECOGNIZE A DEFICIENCY: "Because the body can store B12 for three to five years, early symptoms of a deficiency usually appear gradually, so you're unlikely to notice them," says Middleberg. After initial clues like fatigue, weakness, and brain fog set in, says Middleberg, more advanced tip-offs show up, such as numbness and tingling of the limbs, depression, and paranoia, even hallucinations. The signs are so varied and they don't strike everyone, so it's tough to diagnose even at a later stage. "Which symptoms hit when depends also on what caused the deficiency—malabsorption, which could mean they are absorbing some B12 and the deficiency is occurring more slowly, or total lack of animal products, which would likely cause the deficiency to develop more quickly," says Middleberg.

A BLOOD TEST IS THE ONLY WAY TO CONFIRM IT: The CDC defines vitamin B12 deficiency as blood levels below 200 pg/mL (picograms/milliliter), says Moon. "Blood tests are generally accurate, but a false positive is possible related to certain cancers, oral contraceptives, folate (folic acid) deficiency, and pregnancy," she says. "False negatives are also possible, as sometimes seen in people with liver disease, poorly functioning kidneys, or certain blood cell disorders." Your GP or primary care physician can take care of testing you.

IT’S LINKED TO IMMUNE SYSTEM ISSUES: "B12 plays an important role in white blood cell production, and white blood cells are essential for proper immune system functioning," says Middleberg. Not only can a lack of B12 lower your immunity, some immune system disorders can increase your likelihood of becoming deficient. Grave's disease, for example, an autoimmune condition of the thyroid causing hyperthyroidism, is a risk factor for developing pernicious anemia, which in turn leads to B12 deficiency.

DIGESTIVE PROBLEMS CAN CAUSE IT: People who deal with GI issues are at a higher risk of a B12 shortage because digestive problems can make absorbing the nutrient more difficult, says Middleberg. "Those with gut issues, such as colitis, Crohn’s disease, inflammatory bowel disease, and leaky gut syndrome are at a higher risk," she says. Celiac disease sufferers can also have problems with absorption. If you have any of these, talk to your doctor about supplements or B12 shots, since all the B12-rich food in the world won't help your body shore up its reserves if it can't be absorbed by the GI tract.

IT CAN HAPPEN AFTER WEIGHT LOSS SURGERY: "Some surgeries that affect the GI tract, like gastric bypass surgery, make it hard to absorb B12," says Moon. One reason has to do with the decrease in the body's ability to digest food; it's also caused by iffy levels of intrinsic factor, a protein that helps the body absorb B12. The absorption problem could be a permanent one, and people who undergo gastric bypass may need to take vitamin B12 supplements for the rest of their life or risk a shortage.

IT CAN CAUSE TINGLING, WEAKNESS, AND BALANCE ISSUES: Depletion of your vitamin B12 stores leads to nerve damage. No wonder pins and needles in your hands and feet, shaky body movements, and trouble walking are all consequences of long-term B12 deficiency, says Middleberg. Like so many other B12 deficiency signs, these can be attributed to other causes, including old age. The only way to know for sure is to see your doctor for a test.

BABIES CAN GET IT TOO: In infants, vitamin B12 deficiency is serious—it can lead to symptoms such as anemia, problems with movement, difficulty reaching developmental milestones, and failure to thrive, which may be fatal. Low B12 levels are rare in infants but it can happen if a baby is fed a strict diet free of any animal products or if a breastfeeding mom is a vegan who doesn't take vitamin B12 supplements (and breast milk is the only source of nutrition.) B12 supplementation can reverse the course, one study from the journal Pediatrics shows, and taking prenatal vitamins fortified with B12 in pregnancy can help prevent it.

VISIBLE SIGNS INCLUDE PALE SKIN, A SORE TONGUE, AND MOUTH ULCERS: Paleness; mouth sores; a red, swollen, beefy tongue—these are some of the visible signs of a B12 shortage. Caused by deficiency-related changes in blood flow, these signs can show up years after the depletion sets in, says Middleberg. A rapid heartbeat or heart palpitations is another blood flow-related sign, and sometimes bruising easily is also a result of a longstanding deficiency. But these seemingly unrelated signs don't show in all B12 deficient people, or they come on so slowly, it's hard to notice them, says Middleberg.

IT MIGHT CAUSE PERMANENT DAMAGE: Vitamin B12 deficiency that persists for years can cause severe, irreversible neurological damage—think memory loss, disorientation, and an inability to concentrate. Other permanent side effects include nerve damage, insomnia, erectile dysfunction, even difficulty with bowel and bladder control, says Moon. The upside: "Many symptoms can be reversed if caught early and treated with B12," she adds.

IT’S HARD TO OVERDO VITAMIN B12: Unlike fat-soluble vitamins that accumulate in your body and can have side effects in excess, B12 is a water-soluble vitamin, meaning your body only absorbs a small amount and the rest is excreted through urine, says Middleberg, Good news if you need to refill your stores of this nutrient, but worry about taking too much. But keep in mind that large amounts of B12 at one time may cause diarrhea and all-over itchiness, she adds. If your doctor recommends supplements, read the label and take only the amount recommended by your M.D.

{By: Esther Crain, Health Media Ventures, Inc.} - The material in this site is intended to be of general informational use and is not intended to constitute medical advice, probable diagnosis, or recommended treatments. Always consult your physician. 

Much Love, Dr.Shermaine #InformativeRead #PleaseShare #HealthyBodySoulAndSpirit

"It's Not Selfish to Love Yourself, Take Care of Yourself and to Make Your Happiness a Priority. It's a Necessity." (Mandy Hale)

"Self-Care is Not Selfish. You Cannot Serve From an Empty Vessel." (Eleanor Brown)

"The Types of Friends You Need to Ditch NOW!"

 

Many of us have experienced make-overs, be it our hair, clothing, make-up, etc…but how many of us have given any thought to making over our social circle? While research shows that our friendships are super important for our health and well-being, not all relationships are created equal. “Negative friendships can cause stress, frustration, and even put you in harm’s way if their behavior puts you in situations that could jeopardize you and your loved ones,” says sociologist and friendship coach Jan Yager, PhD, author of When Friendship Hurts ($13, amazon.com).

Investing time and energy into people who don’t pay it back—or who only have toxic contributions to offer—can have a negative effect on both your physical and mental health. In fact, a recent University of College London Study found that close relationships that cause stress or worrying may even contribute to faster cognitive decline as you age! 

On that note, here are five types of friends you may want to sweep out of your life as you clean up your social and inner circle.

THE NEGATIVE NANCY:

Moods—both good and bad ones—are contagious: Research has shown this to be true in both real life and online social networks. And while there’s nothing wrong with venting to coworkers or crying to your BFF when you’re feeling low, it’s still important to balance those lows by sharing happy experiences, too. “When you talk on the phone with your friend, exchange e-mails or text messages, or get together in person, do you feel positive and optimistic—or does a particular friend make you feel bad about yourself, agitated, or even physically ill?” asks Yager. If that friend is going through an especially trying time, it’s normal to feel pulled into the drama. But ask yourself, she says: “Is this an occasional thing, or a chronic pattern that’s making it too difficult for you to handle your emotions or your own life?” If the latter’s the case, it’s time to seriously consider phasing them out.

Its’ one thing to have a friend have a bad day, but having the same friend have a consistent bad day, week, month and year, repetitively is neither good for them or you. In everything we do, no matter what it is, there ought to be balance. You should never maintain a friendship where every time you look at your phone and see their name, you cringe! Wondering every time, “what is it this time? Who said what this time? What does she have to complain about this time? Who is she calling to talk bad about this time?” When a person brings overwhelming negativity to your life, it’s time to ditch them! Sooner or later, their negative, pessimistic attitude and approach to life will contagiously catch a hold of you! One of the definitions of “contagious” is “likely to spread to and affect others.” And that is exactly what a negative person does, they share and spread their negativity. Think about it, during the winter season, we go to greater lengths than in any other season to avoid people with a cold because we don’t want to catch what they’ve got! If someone has “pink eye”, you steer clear, not even wanting to make eye contact from a distance. If someone has a rash, you don’t want them to touch you in anyway. And God help us if someone has chickenpox, surely we avoid them at all costs! Well, you need to start treating “Negative Nancy” like she has the flu, with pink eye, a rash and the chickenpox, all at the same time! You don’t want to catch what she has! So, like it or not, you’ve got to Nix Negative Nancy!

“A negative thinker sees a difficulty in every opportunity. A positive thinker sees an opportunity in every difficulty.” (Author Unknown);

“You can’t live a positive life with a negative mind.” (Author Unknown);

“Negative people need drama like oxygen. Stay positive, it will take their breath away.” (Author Unknown);

“An entire body of water of the sea can’t sink a ship unless it gets inside the ship. Similarly, negativity of the world can’t put you down unless you allow it to get inside you.” (Author Unknown);

“If you cannot be positive, at least be quiet.” (Joel Osteen);

“Don’t let negative and toxic people rent space in your head. Raise the rent and kick them out.” (Robert Tew);

“Don’t bring negative to my door.” (Dr. Maya Angelou)

THE NIT-PICKY NEIGHBOR:

You live next door to her so you’ve tried, on many occasions, to be nice: You’ve had her over for dinner, carpooled, and encouraged your kids to play together. But if your friendly gestures are mostly returned with complaints about noise or the look of your lawn, her constant demands could be harming your health. A 2014 Danish study found that frequent arguments and conflicts within a person’s social circle, including neighbors, were associated with an increased risk of death in middle age. Conflict management may help reduce these dangers, the study authors say—so the next time she picks a fight, try sitting down and hashing out your differences (or at least agreeing to ignore each other) once and for all.

However, this can extend beyond just the neighbor you live next to. This can also point to the neighbor (friend/associates) you sit next to at work and at church. You need to rid yourself of those who nit-pick at any and everything! And Since You’re Not Glued to the Chair, Move Your Seat! The term “nit-picking” is defined as “informal fussing or pedantic fault-finding.”  That word “pedantic” is defined as “a person excessively concerned with minor details.” Kick those people out of your social and inner circle that constantly complain about anything, everything and nothing, all at the same time! Every minor detail (that holds absolutely no weight of importance) they harp on that does nothing more than waste time, energy and attention, need to be avoided! And you know how to spot them too, they often make comments like: “why is she doing that? Why is he sitting there? Why is she wearing that? Who told him he could do that? Why is she picking up that piece of paper and moving it from the floor to the garbage? Why is he touching that?” Mind you, none of these things has anything to do with them, none of them hold any importance or relevance, they are just plain nit-picking-nosy! Get rid of these people from your life before you find yourself fuming mad over a piece of lent on someone else’s shirt!

“Beware, the person who’s always discussing the flaws of others and nitpicking. Avoid him as he can lead you down the path of self-destruction.” (Pinterest);

“Nitpicking can be simply defined as giving far too much major attention to unimportant minor details.” (Pinterest);

“There are some people who always seem angry and continuously look for conflict. Walk away; the battle they are fighting isn’t with you, it is with themselves.” (Positive Outlook);

“Sometimes, you have to get to a point of total frustration before you’ll be ready to make a big change. Don’t wait for what anyone else should do but hasn’t yet and likely won’t. Instead, look for what is up to you and what you can do to change the situation for the better…even if it means walking away entirely.” (Doe Zantamata)

THE BACKSTABBER:

So a friend let you down in some way, but she’s promised to make it up to you. Everyone deserves a second chance, but maybe this isn’t the first time you’ve felt betrayed by her. Where do you draw the line? Personal relationships are complex, so there isn’t a clear-cut way to decide. Yager says that in her research she’s found that what’s considered a “deal breaker” is different for everyone. “One person said that for her, it was when her former friend was not there for her when her mother died. Another woman didn’t see it as a deal breaker when she walked in on her roommate and found her kissing her boyfriend…but she ended that same friendship years later, over a work-related betrayal.” Before deciding to immediately cut out a friend who’s done you wrong—or to immediately take them back—sit down and consider all aspects of this breach of trust, including how bad it made you feel, Yager suggests. “Can you [honestly] forgive them? Do they even ask for forgiveness or apologize? Is this a one-time thing or a pattern? And what does your gut tell you about this friend, and about the future of your friendship?” These questions can help you decide whether mending the relationship is possible or if it’s time to let the friendship fade out.

You are not obligated to restore ALL things! You are NOT Jesus! At some point you have to evaluate a friendship for what it really is, not what’s in your head. You can’t keep pulling the same person back into your embrace, when experience has revealed, multiple times, that they still have knives in their hands every single time. They’re just waiting for you to embrace them once again. It’s okay to forgive, and let go, literally! The term “backstabbing” is defined as “the action or practice of criticizing someone in a treacherous manner while feigning friendship.” This is the person who only asks “how are you?” so you can share your pain, and then they can wipe your tears, and simultaneously share your pain with others. Not everyone inquiring if you’re well, really cares if you’re well! Be upfront with backstabbers, forgive (for your own sake and peace), and then if need be, to spare your own life, rid yourself of backstabbers!

“Here’s your knife back, I finally got it out of my back. I’m sure you’ll be needing it again soon.” (Author Unknown);

“People will stab you in the back and then ask why you’re bleeding” (Pinterest);

“The saddest thing about betrayal is that it never comes from your enemies.” (Pinterest);

“Dealing with backstabbers, there was one thing I learned. They’re only powerful when your back is turned.” (Eminem);

“Everybody isn’t your friend. Just because they hang around you and laugh with you doesn’t mean they are your friend. People pretend well. At the end of the day, real situations expose fake people, so pay attention.” (Trent Shelton);

“Be careful who you share your weaknesses with. Some people can’t wait for the opportunity to use them against you.” (Pinterest)

THE CHRONIC CANCELER:

If you spend more time waiting around for this person to show up—or trying to schedule and reschedule plans—than actually hanging out together, you may want to let this friendship run its course. First, take a careful look at why your friend has such trouble keeping plans; if it’s truly a good reason, like a new baby or an ongoing health issue, ask if there’s anything you can do to make staying in touch easier. Yager also recommends weighing what you get out of the friendship against what it’s costing you. “If the cost is minimal in terms of occasional aggravation, but the benefits are huge—like the laughs you still share on the phone and the fun nights out at the movies you still have—don’t be so quick to end it.” On the other hand, if you’ve done all you can and you’re not getting much in return, it’s time to stop wasting your energy. We’re all busy. Constantly being put last by a “friend” can only lead to negative feelings that you don’t need.

Let’s be honest, we all have long agendas and to-do-lists, but there is time for what you value and treasure. No one on earth is that busy! Think about it: Even Jesus ate, slept, spent time with friends and family (and even enemies), He even wept. And clearly there is no one as busy as Jesus! Yet, He had balance to His life. And if He can, so can they. Don’t continue to be frustrated by someone who never has time for you. There’s a huge difference between someone who talks to you in their free time, and the person who frees their time just to talk to you. You should never be in a friendship/relationship where you feel you are always begging and pleading for someone’s time and attention. If they are not giving you their best, maybe they simply are not the best for you. Make sure you’re investing in friendships/relationships that are equally investing in you. If they can’t schedule you in, take them out of your schedule. 

“People make time for who they want to make time for. People text, call and reply to people they want to talk to. Never believe anyone who always says they’re too busy. If they wanted to be around you, they would.” (Simple Reminders);

“When you actually matter to a person, they’ll make time for you. No lies, no excuses.” (Pinterest);

“We all make time for what we feel is important in our lives.” (Pinterest);

“No one is always busy. It just depends on what number you are on their priority list.” (Pinterest);

“If a person wants to be a part of your life, they will make an obvious effort to do so. Think twice before reserving a space in your heart for people who do not make an effort to stay.” (Pinterest);

“Don’t give Part-Time people a Full-Time position in your life.” (LiveLifeHappy);

“Priorities: When someone tells you they are too ‘busy’…it’s not a reflection on their schedule; it’s a reflection of YOUR spot on their schedule.” (Dr. Steve Maraboli);

“We make time for what we love. Pay attention. People will show you…your worth to them.” (Joshua Ryan Stewart)

THE BAD EXAMPLE:

She drags you along on her smoking and heavy-drinking nights out. She scoffs at your new healthy eating and exercise plan and shoves the Cheetos in your direction. Whatever this friend’s fault, if you feel yourself getting sucked into bad behavior whenever you spend time together, it’s time to back off. Research shows that, in addition to bad moods, plenty of other qualities can spread among friends—including loneliness, obesity, and even divorce. Even your dietary choices can be affected by your companions: In one University of Illinois study, people were more likely to order the same foods at a restaurant as their lunch partners. You may not need to ditch these friends entirely—especially if they also have good qualities you value, or if you know they have the potential to change. But be aware of how their unhealthy habits are rubbing off on you, says Yager. Try talking to these friends about why you can’t be around them when they act a certain way, or avoid situations that enable that side of them.

If you’re more likely to behave unseemingly for your character, because you’re around a certain individual, than it’s time you come from around that individual. You want to be in an inner circle that promotes positivity, and for sure healthiness (body, soul and spirit). You don’t need someone telling you fried food is good all the time, or we can skip prayer night, or you can spend time with the kids another night, or I wouldn’t take that if he was my husband. You need people in your friendship/social circle / inner circle that compel you to do and be better. People who challenge you to be a better version of you. People whose speech is healthy, habits are healthy, lifestyle is healthy, outlook is healthy. You need people in your life who believe in Jesus, who go to church, who study and heed His word, who pray, praise and worship. But you also need people in your life that exercise, eat right, support their friends, encourage their family and are engaged in the good in life. A bad seed, can’t produce good fruit! If you want to reap good in your life, kick out the bad example!

“It is better to be alone than in bad company.” (George Washington);

“As the saying goes that a man is known by the company he keeps. Good company can make a man whereas bad company can ruin him.” (Sam Veda);

“As much as people refuse to believe it, the company you keep does have an impact and influence on your choices.” (Pinterest);

“You cannot hang out with negative people and expect to live a positive life.” (Joel Osteen);

“When you have to start compromising yourself or your morals for the people around you, it’s probably time to change the people around you.” (Pinterest);

“Never lie, steal, cheat, or drink. But if you must lie, lie in the arms of the one you love. If you must steal, steal away from bad company. If you must cheat, cheat death. And if you must drink, drink in the moments that take your breath away.” (Will Smith);

“You must constantly ask yourself these questions: Who am I around? What are they doing to me? What have they got me reading? What have they got me saying? Where do they have me going? What do they have me thinking? And most important, what do they have me becoming? Then ask yourself the big question: Is That Okay?” (Jim Rohn);

“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with. Choose wisely.” (Jim Rohn)

By: Amanda MacMillan, Health Magazine / Dr. Shermaine Y. Sanders, Self-Care with Dr. Shermaine 

Much Love, Dr.Shermaine, #InformativeRead #PleaseShare #HealthyBodySoulAndSpirit #IWantYou2LiveWell
The Goal is to Always Make You Aware of What Concerns Your Body, Soul and Spirit, So You Can Have Open, Honest and Frequent Discussions With Your Physicians and Counselors. You Can’t Treat or Cure What You Don’t Know is Sick.
  "It's Not Selfish to Love Yourself, Take Care of Yourself and to Make Your Happiness a Priority. It's a Necessity." (Mandy Hale)
"Self-Care is Not Selfish. You Cannot Serve From an Empty Vessel." (Eleanor Brown)